I still haven’t finished the good post I wanted to. It’s on my to do list for tomorrow. I want it just right before I publish it because it’s a meditation I do, and I want to make sure it’s easy to follow but conveys all the elements I run through.
Anyway, as far as getting there, it applies to my re-evaluation of my life.
I just wanted to note I’m in a really good work situation, and super appreciative of all the accolades I receive from clients and co-workers. It definitely helps me keep going when my emotions get the better of me, and reinforces something that Nathan tells me regularly “I’m a spectacular massage therapist”. I’m also very appreciative that it always seems to align with my physical needs. Katherine hasn’t been sleeping well for a couple of weeks, so I’ve been droopy and I have been getting enough down time to compensate. Very grateful.
I’m loving my new home, even if has kept me in constant motion for over a month. It’s beautiful and just spacious enough I feel the improvement every time we get another element unpacked and situated. Plus the good weather day I spent most of outside with kids and doglett doing things in the back yard. It was good and very spirit lifting.
There are only 2 things I would change.
1) I really miss having a van and a second vehicle. That is on the short list to fix.
2) My relationships need work- obviously, I think it has made me a little crazy of late. And I mean all of them. With myself. With my husband. With letting go of my birth family and other past hopefuls. With genuinely opening the door to truthful newcomers. I have started with myself and put Nathan a close second. That has been eating all my extra time this week. I am very focused on letting go of connections, cutting cords, and clearing attachments and their emotions. I haven’t cleared the process and it’s very heavy and taxing, but I’m going to keep chipping away at it
So if you’re reading this, send me some love. I’m working on slowly getting to a more unconditional place and releasing hopes and expectations of others. It’s hard and that is more compounded when I only have my husband to turn to for emotional support. It just is, not impossible, just difficult.
May you all have release and improvement. May you understand relationships fully and be able to release any that no longer serve you. May you find forgiveness and an ability to function even when processing heavy emotions. May you find patience with other when they are doing the same. May we all find more unconditional love and acceptance for others in our experience.
Siva Hir Su