Feeling the burn

FOCUS! – Fearless Motivation” on YouTube

Thank you @FearlessMotivation, the song helps, but running still sucks. Hiding behind my smile is a grimace and scowl.

I’m at 24 hours of perfect habbits, a week of good behavior. Just had my blood drawn this morning, so it’ll reflect my previous average more, especially with just having come out of the thyroid storm.

Though I’m a bit anxious to see the lab work results, I know I’m already working towards better.

My workout yesterday was the first attempt at aiming toward what my one client does everyday of late. Aiming is the key word. I did not get there. I ran about half of 2 miles in 2 minute increments, dropping to my speed walking range in-between. And finished with one set of weightlifting. So sort-of almost half of her routine.

I discovered that running slow like one friend had suggested felt very awkward- I can’t run slow. I literally felt off balance and like I was going to trip myself. Running at 6 to 6.5mph, fast for me, but only slightly over the slow run pace of friend suggestions corrected the wobbly incongruency. But because I never run it still was a killer. Running has only ever been a response to emergency/pseudo-emergencies or rarely for being late. So I literally felt like my body wasn’t getting enough oxygen and I would have to slow down to just be able to catch up breathing. It kinda pissed me off.

Nathan said I should congratulate myself for even trying. He reminded me that not quite 7 years ago I was 300 pounds and that I’ve never run except for short sprints. He said it was a valliant decent effort. He also reminded me that it would likely have left him on the floor at best and in the ER at worst.

All I know is on the treadmill I alternated between cursing heavily and repeating: “Treasa you can do this.” I will definitely have to work hard at improvement to get where my client is.

To be fair, before her thyroid crash she was a soccer player in college. I have never participated in ANY sports, EVER.

So the painful aim at making friends with running has begun. And my diet is back on track with what I did during 2nd pregnancy. Yea rabbit food.

Now I’m off to today’s workout before my first client at the clinic, hopefully my blood draw won’t slow that down.

May you have good progress and see your improvement. May you focus on your goals, and keep your dreams, even if they remain just dreams. May you understand your body and it’s needs. May you be able to keep up with all of it.

Siva Hir Su

Update: 2nd new workout was only very slightly easier. I went directly into 2 massages and was in fairly constant motion from 10am to 2pm. My legs are cranky and I just hit tired. I have one more client and then I can go rest. Yea me. I sincerely hope this all pays off eventually.

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