Ode to a fart

Sometimes I have no idea where something comes from, but if it’s strong enough or amusing enough, I have to follow through.

This is one such moment.

I was struck by an intense desire to text a certain someone that they’d already farted in front of me, and in fact what seems like ages ago. I was being nudged very strongly to “break the (embarrassing) ice”, and though amusing I wasn’t sure how that would go. Like: “really, text someone at 9pm to tell them they’d already farted in front of me!?!?!” My mind kept saying: ‘bad idea. Really bad idea!’

But I’m still being nudged.

So I thought a poem instead.

Ode to a fart

Sinky
Smelly
Sometimes
Right there
"Dude you dropped a massive one!"

Other times
Silent
Sneaky
Before you know it
Deadly
Stench
None can break free from

Onions
Garlic
Pale in comparison
Vampires would
Welcome their
Enemy
Over SBD

Garlic rots
Onions wilt
At just the sound
Of it's name
Silent but deadly

Never oh never
Can such a horrid bomb
Be released
In public
It would decimate
Olfactory nerves
For miles and miles

Don't dare
Light a
Flame
You never know
It's blast radius

And they always
Seem to KNOW
No one really
Gets away with it

Just think
The next time
You are in a mask-less
Zone

How many
Bombs
You survived
Because of
Covid!

   ~ Treasa Cailleach

Ok, it’s official. I’m a dork with a messed up sense of humor. I have no idea the reason or cause, but by the time I finished my little poem here, I was giggling.

I hope you have a good laugh. May you understand your messages and know why you’re supposed to do something. May you have good connections with those around you and be comfortable expressing things you are guided to say.

Om Shanti

About Treasa Cailleach

I'm a massage therapist working with chiropractic and the elderly; musician, artist, pagan, mom, B of LGBTQ, & polyamorous professional.

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