Extrastential Crisis

Yes that is misspelled. It’s on purpose. Anya was about 4 when she first tried to say the word and couldn’t say it right, that’s how it sounded when she said it. It fits with how I’m feeling today.

So, I have been drawn deeply into She-Ra. In just a few days I’ve gone from “cool, look there’s a reboot from a show I watched as a kid” to “holy shit, why does this run so deep in me, and why the overlapping themes/messages!”.

As I’m watching I’m seeing overlapping messages with Battlestar Galactica and even just basic mysticism here on planet Earth. This show was either made by well informed geeks, or carries a grander message (from whom?) that has been told in many ways over many years in our times.

That whole you’ve been here and done this before. You aren’t the first and won’t be the last. The whole needing to reach for balance in the forces of nature and mitigate the damage of power, greed, corruption, and technology. Help humans save themselves, and win against the negative/evil forces at play. Layer that with concepts of other planets and alien races having come to our current reality to… (depends on the source if that’s to help or interfere).

In all of this Shiva starts in again, I could hear the messages and sense the energy, and I lost my shit. I literally tried to shower it off and started ranting at Shiva.

I’ve got no magic sword, no tools to use, no group of friends to help me win the fight. Why the hell can’t you just beam up the few of us that are trying to make things right and let the rest of this God forsaken plant destroy itself? Why is it so damn important to try and save planet Earth?

Several thousand years of human experience on this planet, a dozen or more ascended masters (Jesus, Buddha, Shiva/Avalokitesvara/Quan Yin, etc.) and humans are still hell bent on self-destruction.

We still fight with each other constantly, singling out races or certain factions of our society to target and eliminate, often through actual war machanisms. We think technology will be our saviour while it continues to instigate addictions and do damage in ways we only recently have even begun to acknowledge. Our medical system is more interested in making money off of fear than actually solving any disease.

AND instead of trying to learn how to function with the unseen world and understand the fullness of God force and it’s benefits and applications, we’re busy playing ostrich or trying to disprove it’s existence.

In She-Ra first ones had figured out how to master both technology and the unseen magic of divine force and combined them to create wondrous helpful technology that when in balance was literally a perpetually safe world. (The battle came in trying to keep it out of the wrong hands and in balance.)

In our actual real world the first ones too supposedly came and helped humanity. The oldest documented stories of people from the sky, coincided with improvements in human tools, clothing and homes. They even supposedly intermingled with us to give our DNA a boost which in turn helped evolution. I’m not making this shit up, I first learned about it through discovery channel and history channel as a teenager. Multiple societies across the globe have ancient references to sky people and their helpfulness.

Yet again, even with their help and all of the ascended in masters of every religion, we’re all still bent on fighting, negativity and self-destruction.

So, why me? Why do I have the spirit of Shiva (and no, I have no idea if it’s the original or a more recently departed human version) yammering in my ear trying to tell me that all of this is part of my mission?!?!?!?!!!! AAARGH!!!

I may be a bit overwhelmed and unsure of myself at the moment. I’ve exercised twice today trying to channel all of this energy more effectively, and I still feel like I’m going stir-crazy. No nix that, just crazy.

On top of that I am still trying to figure out how to allow my body to transform to the beautiful venus body I know I am supposed to have. She-Ra isn’t helping with that either. She has the cartoon version of what I am supposed to look like. I’ve got the strength and muscles, but they’re still burried under 60+ pounds of fat I’d like to stop carrying around. I’m kinda wishing I had a magic sword that morphed me into the warrioress that She-Ra is, it’d save some human steps.

It all boils down to a sense of things being revealed, but only enough to get even more confusing, not clearer.

Nathan reminded me I’m not alone, and that there is an army of us, but we’re all spread out. He added that technology has helped some because we are aware of each other more and more because of the likes of youtube, blogging, and social platforms. He also reminded me that if other planets are concerned about human well fare then there must be a reason and it’s a good thing to be drawn to be on the good side.

Sigh.

I don’t know, I don’t fully understand, I feel like my skills are not near good enough for that kind of battle, and still wonder why on Earth did they pick me as one of them. Why care about a race that has spent thousands of years killing each other and creating ever more creative ways to do so? If they want me to be on the good side, just beam us up, and let the rest implode.

Well shit, I just repeated myself again. Sigh. I’m gonna let it go for a bit, take some herbs, and revisit after my subconscious let’s something helpful in.

May you have less of an existential crisis. May you know your purpose here on planet Earth. May you see the good in human kind and an easy path to bringing everything back in balance. May you know we are all worth saving. May you see why you are the way you are. May you love every ounce of yourself and have the body you prefer. May you know Earth is worth saving, and why. May you know that God loves and supports you.

Om Shanti

About Treasa Cailleach

I'm a massage therapist working with chiropractic and the elderly; musician, artist, pagan, mom, B of LGBTQ, & polyamorous professional.

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