I hit exhaustion about 7:30 last night. I tried to fix it, and failed. At bedtime Nathan helped me out of the hammock and to bed. He took my blood pressure and it was 97/69. My chest was aching and I was congested. I drank water and crashed. I kept telling him I felt like I was dieing and then I would start crying and apologizing for everything.
I’m glad he charged my phone last night, because the power went out with this morning’s storm, and having it charged is enabling me to write this out.
I’m still exhausted even with a full night’s sleep and my thyroid meds. I’m working on more fluids to help blood pressure, and took an extra 30mg of my thyroid medicine to attempt to pull up.
My psychic antenna is in overdrive and I keep getting snippets of multiple conversations. I suspect I know who some of them are, but it’s super overwhelming and contributing to a sense of dieing. I sat in the hammock a bit ago and cried, asking no one in particular to make it stop.
My kids aren’t helping with their usual toddler volley of fighting and playing. They are just being kids but I need quiet, so I’m withdrawing to avoid yelling at them. The dog is happy to cuddle with me, and so is my buddy cat.
Everything is so off.
I hope I can figure out how to fix this and not actually die. For now I’m going to rest some more. My body needs love in a massive way and I’m not sure how to accomplish that on my own.
May you have adequate rest and answers when you need them. May you know and understand why you are feeling the way you do. May you always know what you need, your solutions. May you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.