25 of 27: Drops

Higher and deeper
I didn't maintain
Fitness, weight capacity,
Schedule or sleep
I didn't die
I didn't run away
Tears ran instead
While hopes died
Words unjust
Feelings crippled
Irrevocable statements
A fraction of
Thoughts thought
Not all mine
In their own right

Life and love
A game leading to
Brokenness?
Or genuine experience
Intended to feel
Beautiful?
Love feels
Tangible and strong
Until everything crumbles
One person can
Only bear
So much
When love dies with
Her lover's health
Games are no fun
When always the looser
Life is supposed to be
Fun

I did survive
I did strive
I did do everything
I could
Right up until
I broke
Snapped like a twig

I deserve healing
I deserve to be a
Beautiful Venus
I deserve that
Which I worked for
I deserve that which
Was dreamt and dashed

Exhillerating ride
On vortex's edge
They say
Running my fastest
Leaping chasms
Reaching my best
There is no one there
No hand to grasp
No arms to catch

Why am I running so hard
Why bother jumping
Why care to reach
If there is no
One
No reason to
Get there

She-Ra kicked ass
Friends helped
He-Man never showed
Coward leaving her
All the dirty work
Nasty sibling
Watch him
Take the credit
With those who
Don't know
The truth

Ours is broken
And it takes more
To fix it
Than He-Man cares
Let him live his lies
I will still survive
On my own
Outside the game
He plays
Breaking hearts
Of family

Let him die in his system
Let him wallow
I have already wept
And fought
And killed my demons
And killed demons for others
And even if the world never
Knows or cares
I will

I survived
Intact and whole
I already won
I deserve everything
I want and desire
And even if I never
Receive it
I know what I did
The work I accomplished
The good I have done
The self-preservation
I accomplished
On my own
At the expense of none

I helped myself
While I helped others
Even telling He-Man what to do
To save himself
I saved my husband and kids
While I saved others
All whom chose to listen
I conquered
Where man and medicine
Failed

I am a superheroine
Dressed as an
Average
Overweight
Middle-aged
Woman
Honor is mine
Mine alone
I did it myself
Without
Tricks or deception
Manipulation or lies
I did it
Honestly
I fought for
Myself
Because I know
I am deserving
I know I have been
Done wrong

Let him pin his
Own wings on
I grew mine
From inside
Anchored to
My war ravaged
Heart
~ Treasa Cailleach

About Treasa Cailleach

I'm a massage therapist working with chiropractic and the elderly; musician, artist, pagan, mom, B of LGBTQ, & polyamorous professional.

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