Daily schedule

The long short

6am
Wake
Shower
Dress
Fix drinks
Snacks
For days work
Parent's Supplements
Breakfast shake
Kids, pets
First meal
Vitamins

7:55am
Pile into
Our only van
Usually 2
Sometimes 4
Occasionally all 5

8:00-8:30
First drop
Immediate need
Based on location
And punch in time
If not Anya
It's me

8:30-8:45
Second drop
If Anya was first
Then this one is me

9:30
Dialysis appointments
Usually
Sometimes another doc
Rarely another commitment

Mid-day:
Varies greatly
When Anya
Starts later
Then it gets really
Interesting
Homeschool
Books, tablets, bickering
Older helps younger
Begrudgingly
Parents wonder
Myriad of thoughts
Pushing on through
Shipt
Deliveries
Other doctors
Labs to have drawn
Grocery shopping
Errands
For me any breaks of work
Become about self care
Or I receive no care
Occasionally kids get
Playground
Fill the van fuel
Pick-ups
Sometimes Anya before me

5-5:30
My last call
For work
My last
Moments of
Calm
Focus

6
Home
Mommy's home
Bark bark
Put work away
Put self in home
Reach for presence
In whirlwind
Dinner
Make it
Then eat
Minecraft stories
Running
Jumping
TV, Netflix, YouTube
Pick your poison
Chaos
Grab a sofa cushion
Hold on till the
Spinning stops
Dishes, done by someone
Bedtime stories by Dad
Laundry sometimes vital
It waited too long
Kids want fire s'mores
I want fire peace
Tonight neither
Had time

7:30-8
Dad
Connect to
Dialysis machine
Mom keep kids busy
Sometimes a bath
For me
Or them
Rarely both
Sometimes futile
Efforts to cuddle
Little bodies
Tired
Always wind up
Not down

9:30-10
Last pick-up
Anya had a closing
Shift
Waited long enough
I dozed off

10:30
Finally
Pajamas
Quiet
Calm
Peace
Too bad I'm
Too tired
To savor
Sleep comes easy

Good night
Sighs of
Relief

Tomorrow
Will be
Just like
Today
Day after day
Infinitely
Unending


No spontaneity
No fun
Kids the only ones
To find laughter
Between their bickering

Still waiting
A solution
Must eventually
Become
Evident

My good:
Smiles
Lunch walk in
Sunshine
Petting
Another pooch
More mellow
Than ours
Pictures of
Shadows
Inspired by
Nathan
Made me think
Of years gone by

When I was 12
I told my parents
No kids
I wanted
Independence
Freedom

They told me
I
Was wrong
I was always
Wrong
Somehow
To someone
And Kids', family
No one rejects that
I was obviously
Just not aware
Enough
To know
What was best
For me

None
Ever granted
My true choice
I quit trying
Followed their
Rules
Their
Recommendations
I gave them
What they
Wanted
For me

That was the last
Broken
Piece
Leading
To misalignment
That years
Decades later
Is now
My unending
Schedule of
Duty


~Treasa Cailleach

May you stay oblivious to the why of how you got where you are. If you can’t stay oblivious, may you find speedy solutions to right your situation. May you never find yourself having given too much of yourself away. May you know you are where you want to be. May love always bear positive fruits and enrich your life. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

About Treasa Cailleach

I'm a massage therapist working with chiropractic and the elderly; musician, artist, pagan, mom, B of LGBTQ, & polyamorous professional.

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