Tag Archives: Allopathic medicine

3 things.

I started 2 new art projects.

One is another small ink drawing for fun, I’ll probably finish on Saturday… Maybe the one after, we’ll see. It is of a Hamsa.

The other is a drawing of a furry friend of a really good and kind person that really needed a major pick-me-up. She just happens to be a friend and coworker and the person treating my husband weekly. Her dog is named Herky, short for Hercules, he was a gentle giant of yellow lab. She deserves a good image so I’m doing my best to be meticulous. I also know for certain that she will appreciate my work and treasure it, where past gifts to family were not (going back years).

Progress pics:

Thirdly, I felt the need to make a short-ish statement. I do not hate individuals working in medicine as a generalization. Most of them are doing their best with the information and tools they were trained on. They are all trained on specific rules and procedures in a specific system. I have several clients that are really good people doing their best in an effed up system, and are willing to admit the failings of their profession (s).

What I do hate is the system. I do hate the ones that half ass their jobs and don’t do things they know should be done. I do hate the ones that assume that everything they were trained on was all they ever needed to know, and write off anything else as being helpful. I hate the ones that learn the basics, but if the basics fail they have no idea what else to do. Those are the ones that do a great disservice to everyone they work with. Those are the people that could have killed me. I know without a shadow of a doubt that if I had done what those “medical professionals” had said was good enough, then I would already be dead.

Up until 7 years ago I danced with death more than I didn’t. Everything they had said had failed many times over and I had regularly contemplated suicide, and tried a half dozen times unsuccessfully. Their antidepressants did nothing to help. Metformin didn’t help. I was in serious pain mentally and physically and 300 pounds.

I needed a solution or I was going to die very young.

I did research on alternatives based on loose suggestions and friend’s, even stranger’s journies. I figured out, and started fixing, my own thyroid disease and then those doctors told me I was being dangerous. That iodine (an essential nutrient) was too risky, that I should just take a generic dose of synthroid and behave. It failed and I almost killed myself again, driving 90mph towards an overpass pylon, with my 3 month old child in the carseat behind me. Angels saved me and Ian that day.

I vowed to fix it, so my child never had to go through that.

And I’m getting there, not only an I healing my thyroid, I’m healing the root cause too. It’s slow, but sure as I’m sitting here writing this post, I am certain I am. Even without the precious IV treatments that would speed it up. I now have evidence to show for it.

I’m much smaller, only slightly lighter though, still holding at a little over 200, but much more muscle and much less fat. My skin stays clear, my mild dietary fails hurt less. My skin is shrinking slowly. And most of all, my dances with death are now very few and very far in between. My temper is still there but much less destructive, and I’m learning to control myself especially including my strength. I can’t even begin to convey how much more stable my brain function is and how much less dark it is than it used to be. I’m a better person in many ways. It is my proof.

Now I’m doing my best to teach my husband and children, to help them through their lives. Nathan already knew a lot of what I was doing and why, but now that he has increased reasons to try, he’s making an even more concerted effort to keep up with my standards for myself.

All of this has made me grateful that me and Ian almost died. I made a solmn vow and I intend to keep it.

I’m grateful that doctors failed me because I’ve proven that you can heal yourself and fix yourself with enough research, effort, and loving support. I’m grateful that I had just enough inspired moments to keep me alive and keep me trying again and again. I’m grateful that the divine has guided me though a very difficult and complex set of bodily functions to unravel my health concerns and point me towards healing. I’m grateful that even though I’m unable to accomplish the IV treatments, that I’m smart enough to figure out the next best things. I’m grateful that I’ve strengthened my willpower to be able to stick to things enough to help heal my body. I’m grateful for all of it, because it shows everyone aware of me, that there is always an alternative and there is always a solution- if you stay open to it.

May you see the scary and upsetting moments in your life in the best light. May you know your worth and that your efforts really have mattered. May you find your healing. May you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

I deserve better.

I have been doing my best in many ways, but lately I am intent on clinging to the positives. Because of that, and my mountain of paperwork and projects, I haven’t been writing much. It seems I need to address a few things though.

First, I wrote this poem on my other site last night, and wanted to share it here for those interested.

Beyond that, I am doing my best to heal. I acknowledge that I have strong awareness of energetic components of our experience here on Earth, and lately it seems that Cvid aftermath and Energetics are making it very difficult to reach for my own healing. Regardless, I have been doing my best as usual.

To that end I have debated writing at all lately. I deserve better and I know the best way to accomplish that is to stay focused on the positives as much as humanly possible. For myself that has been many hours of focusing on my desires, goals, and preferences. Pretty much any time I’m not talking to someone or invested in paperwork, my mind stays busy focusing on things like in my poem.

However, you can’t focus on the positives, if there are things needing solved right now, then what? If something is broken you must know how to fix it, to be able to work on and focus on such solutions. At the moment that is my biggest peeve with “medicine”. Everyone is pretending the damned vaccine is our saviour and perfect and pressuring those not getting it, and I call bullshit for many reasons.

  • Vaccines have never been infallible, depending on which vaccine is referenced they can have anywhere from a 1 to 3 % risk rate which is anything from mild reactions to death.
  • This vaccine was processed in a tiny fraction of the time of normal vaccines and we really have no true idea of it’s effects yet, any more so than the disease itself.
  • I question why, but also why they are giving it away free. We have been well trained in american society that nothing is truly free, there is always a catch. If they were giving away Tesselas to everyone, you’d stop and ask why/how? If they were suddenly giving away zyrtec, or advil you’d ask why. If they were suddenly giving away any prescription, especially an expensive one like Tribenzor or a highly regulated one like Hydrocodone, you’d know something was up. So why aren’t we having that response here.
  • Additionally, this vaccine has been given a 30min reaction window. If your reactions are not reported within that 30 minutes or before you leave, then they are denying responsibility. Tell me how many drugs of any kind are held to that standard. Even simple cortisone injections have a reaction window much greater than that. And vaccines are exempt from standard lawsuits, we have vaccine court for them- good luck with that process if you do have a reaction.
  • Vaccines only truly benefit a person that has not been exposed to the disease it is used for. We’ve known that for decades, in regards to all vaccines. If you’ve already had the strain that a vaccine is made for, then having caught the disease and survived gets you as much immunity as is possible to begin with. There is no justification for vaccinating someone that has had a confirmed case of the same strain.
  • If a disease mutates both the vaccinated and previously ill individuals are equally at risk of catching the new strain. That has already been addressed repeatedly with Covid already showing new mutations. Last I checked they had suggested as many as 5 new mutations.
  • Plus, the European countries that are ceasing vaccination are doing so for very good reasons. They are noting damage from them that is as bad or worse than Covid itself. The vaccines vs catching Covid, is literally a coin toss as far as risk goes.

That’s just my bullshit detector going off over the vaccine. But I also noted “Medicine”, why?

  • There is no true 100% solution for any chronic disease.
  • Our best efforts have produced pill cocktails that keep viral levels to a minimum and address symptoms of the chronic disease. How does that actually heal anyone?
  • In fact the only diseases we truly heal are bacterial infections, and even some of those we are hitting barriers to full healing (MRSA is an excellent example).
  • 100+ years of study into viruses and the best solution we have is to keep churning out vaccine after vaccine, only protecting those that haven’t already been infected (children), and only for those which vaccines have been developed (that’s why EBV is still a major concern after 80+ years).
  • Yet all these vaccines piled on top of each other, full of toxic chemicals and low conductivity metals, is doing a host of damage to bodily organs and the human brain. In this awareness, more is not necessarily better. More toxicity only leads to other diseases. (Aluminum toxicity is strongly linked to Alzheimer’s, yet it is used in nearly every vaccine currently made.)
  • Autoimmune diseases are climbing as fast as autism, and I personally don’t care if it is the chronic diseases or the vaccines that are causing it. Either way you look at the picture it is obvious we are not solving anything, and in a matter of time millions will be dieing because their bodies ate themselves.
  • Did I mention there is still no solution to having caught a virus that caused damage to your body. Even under the assumption that you completely kicked the virus, once the damage is done you’re better off having a chat with God than your doctor.
  • Western medicine is good at removing damaged organs, doing a transplant if available/necessary. Western medicine is good at fixing broken bones. Anything else they offer is one variation or another of symptom management: pills, dialysis, bariatric oxygenation, pacemaker, etc. They rarely aim at solving the original cause. Even in cancer they treat the tumor(s) and rarely ask why was the tumor there (the one exception is if they can determine a genetic link).

So then why am I on this tangent?

I’ve come across at least 2 known and a third suspected vaccine liar. Those who are against it for similar reasons as me, but are tired of the pressure and lying about having gotten the vaccine. Lying about that shit is never going to solve the problem. If we continue to fail to address the problem as a society, then we will just keep getting more of the same. This has been proven over and over again with BLM, Me Too, racism, sexism, police brutality, LGBTQ concerns and many other issues. If you don’t stand up an call out the wrongness, then you will never see a solution manifest. You can’t solve a problem that doesn’t exist.

Additionally, I have had very upsetting information brought to my attention.

Essentially, the symptoms that Nathan, our kids, and I have had since our mystery virus (aka Cvid) infection; have presented in coworkers.

Nathan’s symptoms were enough that I sent him to the doc and eventually he received his kidney disease diagnosis.

One of the coworkers’ symptoms eventually led to an oblation of her heart, and she was my age (under 40).

Another coworker has been to the doc repeatedly and they are stumped as to what is really happening to her and have put her on BP meds and prilosec to address the only symptoms they have registered with equipment.

So what are these symptoms?

  • Swelling of the legs and/or feet, for me and coworkers it was one sided and mild like women in pregnancy experience, but does fluctuate. For Nathan both legs were really bad and constant.
  • Nausea, intense and intermittent. Makes me want to vomit.
  • Loss of appetite.
  • Intense anxiety or panic attacks. For me this has been like when I have a high thyroid swing, but last blood-work actually showed my thyroid levels being significantly low, too low for a high swing.
  • Feeling like you’re breathing fire, breath hot enough to irritate your face when wearing a mask, but not registering a fever/temperature.
  • Stomach pains, diarrhea, and other digestive upsets even when not eating things known to cause such problems.
  • Headaches and migraines when previously they were rare.
  • Dizziness/vertigo. Two of my clients, one a known long-hauler, and myself have all had significantly worse issues with this. Neck locks up, so dizzy that it affects balance and walking. This used to only happen once every few years and at the beginning of both pregnancies, but now I’m having issues with it at least one out twice a month. My 2 clients it’s become nearly constant.
  • Mental disturbances. My son will be up doing things and not remember where he is at, or what he is doing. I have moments of depression which I can’t fight off like usual. I also have what I call intrusive thoughts- I’m on one topic and suddenly my brain feels the need to interject an extreme negative not always linked to my original thoughts. Nathan has been fighting depression since before the kidney diagnosis, but it’s gotten worse with that news. He is also having what I’m calling short circuit moments, his brain literally misfires and says the wrong words or he doesn’t understand what is being said to him. (Apparently it is a symptom of kidney issues, but overlaps enough with the rest of us I thought I better include it.)
  • Fatigue, often extreme. All of us have noted moments where we have to force ourselves to keep going. When it hits while I’m working out I feel like my legs suddenly weigh a thousand pounds and I can’t catch my breath. I literally have to coax myself through my exercise to be able to finish. Nathan has had moments so intense he falls asleep almost like narcolepsy, and that’s never been a thing for him before. My kids will just say they’re really droopy or groggy but stay fairly functional, occasionally acting like it’s bedtime, but in the middle of the day.
  • Racing heart. It comes and goes. Both of my coworkers had it tested. The one that ended up having an oblation had to have a subdermal monitor implanted to catch the tachycardic moments because the external monitor wasn’t catching them. It feels like your heart is going to explode out of your chest and aches all around your breast bone. I’ve taken my blood pressure every time I feel it, but the cuff never registers any irregularity and my BP is always normal.
  • Body aches. Ever since acknowledging certain food allergies, I’ve had body aches with exposure to them. Now, I fight them nearly constantly and long work days make it nearly intolerable. The worst is always my right upper back, probably because my work also triggers that area, but for nearly two weeks it’s been burning regularly even with maintenance self-care and massage and Acupuncture. It’s really getting old, and I’ve had to resort to advil way more than I am comfortable with. I’ve also have numerous clients specify the same area of chronic severe discomfort with the adage that it never used to be as bad.

It seems to me that for those in my awareness, Covid went after every weak spot imaginable. Yet we have no solution for those that already had the disease and experienced damage as a result. Half of us never even got tested because testing wasn’t available, and by the time it was we were informed it wouldn’t be reliable even for the antibody test (which for me fell under waste of money and wasn’t done). So yeah, my bullshit detector has been ringing like crazy and I want solutions.

Pretending that fewer people had it just because you didn’t test is ludicrous. You are literally ignoring a major portion of the population. Then all the BS already mentioned about vaccines, I say something smells majorly fishy. If medicine actually cared about people living full healthy lives this shit would change. If there isn’t a major change and access to actual healing solutions soon, you are very likely going to see hospitals start filling with long-haulers experiencing organ failures like Nathan.

I supect that there are many people that are slow burn. Those that didn’t feel sick when they tested positive. For all we know Covid went straight to their weak spots and it may be something that doesn’t have very visible symptoms, or maybe their weak spots were originally healthier than other people. Either way, long term you are likely to start seeing those people complain of problems they never had before. Hopefully western medicine’s greed and desire to treat just symptoms doesn’t cause this mess to get worse and create too much for them to handle.

Those of wanting real solutions have been nagging for quite some time now, and I will have no sympathy if they suddenly don’t have enough equipment to treat everyone’s long-term effects. I’ve been asking the establishment to change for several years now, and I know I am not alone.

So what do I want? I want the solution. What does that look like?

  • Healing.
  • Access to tools that really boost both immune function and body self-repair. IV treatments already exist that do both, but they are currently not covered by insurance and so far too infrequently administered to help the population as a whole. The are inaccessible and unaffordable.
  • Affordability and accessibility to those tools and cannabis products, the like of which have healed seizures disorders. That strength and purity is still out of reach for most people even with medicinal cannabis approval quickly spreading the country and world.
  • Doctors actually joining forces to set the system straight. Standing together to right the injustices and fix the brokenness. That requires them caring about people more than dollars again. That requires the whole system caring about people more than dollars.
  • Treating people with the goal of solving the root cause, even if it is complicated to figure out the root cause.
  • Treating people as individuals that are valuable to this world (not just sheep to herd). We treat our cows for mcdonald’s burgers better than we do our own population right now.
  • Doing what is right even if it goes against instructions from upper management. If you know X treatment is safer, more effective, and more likely to help/solve said problem, don’t let them sideline it because it produces less revenue. Stand for what is right and good in this world.

If all of this is so damn impossible, then maybe the whole damn system needs to crumble. If it can’t be fixed, then none of us should trust them. If it can’t be fixed and solutions found then there is no reason to sustain or support them. There is no reason to trust anyone bent on predicating a system set on just perpetuating costly bandages. Save your money and live life as best as you can without them.

That’s a lot, and yes I’m frustrated and angry. I shouldn’t be the only one voicing these concerns. And maybe I’m not, and the great AI funded by our 1%’s is doing a great job at silencing us all. Maybe someone needs to point out to those in control that if they kill us all off, they will have their giant pile of money and an empty world that doesn’t care they are rich. All the fun in being the one on top is lost when there isn’t anyone left under you. If your herd all dies then you have no-one to control and no-one to profit from. Just saying.

May you know your life matters. May you find a way to healing even when the system is against it. May you know you are on the right path and doing your best to help God and our world. May you see your own value and in doing so enable your own healing. May you know that God loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Echo,

Echo, Echo, Echo….


Last night my husband and I took advantage of a digital doctor appointment to get set-up with Medicinal Cannabis Cards. Only a couple of minutes in, the doctor stated “Insurance and Medicine don’t cover tools that heal.” I heard an echo, and Nathan laughed looking directly at me.

She referenced several tools, which I have been attempting in vain to align myself with the resources to accomplish, for myself and my family. She then proceeded to talk about the different elements of medical cannabis and which bodily systems and functions they affected to enable better functionality. She broke down the different CDB’s and terpenes and even the variations of THC and how they affected the body. I was already familiar with some of the data and information, but she gave charts and graphics that really helped narrow down our particular needs and expand our knowledge. I am very appreciative that we will soon be able to access a much more specific array of cannabis tools to help regain health.

Now if I could just get the resources together to do the I-V Oxygenation therapy and even potentially I-V Nutrient therapy for myself and my family. I don’t know how, but I know I need the universe to really cooperate with me.

See 11 years after Nathan’s original diagnosis, and 10 years since our health journey began (& 7 since I got intensely serious), we are still struggling to show success of any kind, and short resources that could potentially make the difference.

We trusted a system that was intended to be a safety net for both the patient and the medical provider. We were told by the hospital, that Nathan was sick enough that we needed to apply for disability to ensure he got care and the hospital got compensated.

We fought and fought. We gave up briefly, then fought some more.

He is finally classified as disabled, but we only got $560.00 in SSI and not a stitch of disability thus far. The lawyer claimed $150 of that and the hospital still wants us to pay them the $110,000.00 we owe them. His student loan is a mountain of paperwork away from being a headache though, not that anyone cares to help with that either. And his recent new diagnosis of Kidney Failure, a different hospital has offered to do standard dialysis, and they are helping him get set-up with medicaid.

He’s gotten more input from the Acupuncturist at the clinic than his team of medical professionals put together.

I have stated the following, many ways, in many posts, but feel the need to reiterate.

I can only speak for the American medical systems, as that is what I have dealt with for a decade.

There is no safety net if you really need it. There are just a lucky few that manage to squeak past all the hurdles and loopholes to actually get what the system promises.

&

They want you to stay sick, because if you really can’t pay, eventually the government will one way or another. See that $110,000.00 we owe to KU Med, if we never ever pay, eventually they will completely write it off, and the government will give them concessions on their taxes. They know that. But it will continue to haunt Nathan’s credit report for as many years as they can drag it out. Tell me how that is okay!!!!

Bonus: if you stay sick, they keep making money on treating your symptoms, regardless of how expensive of a process that may be. There is no incentive for them to get you well. Again, how is that okay!!!!

But I am just a disgruntled bitter person wanting my health back from a disease that they could have solved 80 years ago if they had really want to. They don’t want to solve viruses, because they make too damn much money off of them, and doctors toe the line instead of standing up for what is right and healing their patients.

In July of 1946 the World Health Organization or WHO defined health as:

Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.

Tell me how Covid or Epstein-Barr or any other chronic virus, being allowed to run rampant, is creating health for anyone, especially our entire society. Tell me how shutting down society for a year, causing businesses to close, and people to loose homes and jobs, knowing full well that Western Medicine has no real solution for any virus, is enabling our world to find Health.

The WHO had no problem breaking their own goals of promoting health to try and “STOP” a virus, but they also have no problem enabling insurance companies and medical institutions to keep ignoring the real problems and the potential solutions right under their noses. Because the solutions make less money than the symptom treatments.

I am furious right now, and it has been directed at god more than a couple of times the last couple of weeks. This shit should have stopped 40 years ago, but just keeps being perpetuated by old greedy mostly-white bastards, and the rest of the population just lets it keep happening because they refuse to educate themselves and join forces to make it change. There will be no solution to this mess ever if that doesn’t happen. You can’t find a solution if you never try.

If you just wallow in the problem and throw your hands up in the air as “they said it’s all we have” then that is exactly what you will continue to get.

As for Nathan and I, we are doing our best to move towards our own individual solutions as quickly as possible. It does mean I have been extra extra busy and am now writing less. Please keep us in your prayers that we find all the solutions and resources we need.

May you have the solutions you need. May you know exactly what to do. May you see the falacy of things that will not help you. May you find a way to keep progressing towards better. May things generally start to get easier for you. May you know you have your health under control and stabilized as much as humanly possible. May you always have supportive medical staff. AND above all else, may you know that God loves and supports you, even when it seems otherwise.

Om Shanti