Tag Archives: clarity

Not settling, just paused.

My dad was never supposed to be part of Atira. His leech-like energy-sucking is counter productive to my healing and forward momentum. Yet, I have processed a ton, emotionally speaking, since taking his situation on. So this is merely a segué in my progression forward.

I am not my father, and I am striving to be better and do better than him in most every way. My father is so very not God, and I forgive myself for having made that confusion as a baby. I have seen clearly, as an adult, that trying to please him is (and always was) futility and will never result in the feelings of love that I felt as a baby.

Additionally, this experience has definitely given me a very tangible lesson on how it is okay to let the old, infirm, and unhealthy die. The level of negativity he exudes daily is oppressive; it makes it difficult for my sensitive family to function, and bogs me down in unimaginable ways. So I am definitely ready to release that immediately. I am okay with his passing, knowing that all of that heavy negativity will stop and his spirit will be free of an infinitely oppressive weight. His passing would actually help his own spirit and the world quite significantly.

I do have a responsibility and a duty to do what doctors deemed necessary. I see that what little is being done, is enough to slow the death process, but not enough to eliminate it, so it is only a matter of time. Only God knows how to override that medical process and give my father the quick painless exit he prefers. So I have and will continue to send prayers that his preferred result comes sooner than later.

At the same time, all of the parts of me that carry his weight of oppression can also die. All of the cells and processes damaged by having learned from him can also die. Even brain cells can be transformed to release his patterns. I am okay letting every nano-ounce of his junk go. I even support my body allowing God to turn junk DNA off and more helpful DNA on. I am okay letting the old, infirm, unhealthy parts of myself die and for healing to take their place.

I deserve the wholly beautiful self, inside and out, that my divine half wants me to be. I deserve to have a more stable emotional set point. I deserve to be very even tempered. I deserve to have plenty of patience, and I also deserve to have fewer things test my patience. I deserve to have my understanding acknowledged, because I am more understanding of others than my father will ever attempt to be.

I know I am more compassionate than my father. I know I am more loving than my father. I know I am more caring than my father. I know I am WAY more open minded than my father. I am more accepting than him. I am more thoughtful, courteous, and respectful than him.

So, my Vortex self is all of those good qualities, and letting the old die will enable the Vortex version to manifest more easily. That is a very good thing.

Abraham talks about ignoring what you don’t want and focusing on what you do want. So I am putting a concerted effort into ignoring all of the old dieing parts and focusing intently on the end result.

I’m focusing on: my DNA being flipped, my tummy being small, my skin being toned, my metabolism being high, my emotions stabilizing on a high vibration set point, my temper disappearing, my brain rewiring, and all of my good qualities being honored by others. Those are the elements of me that have been trying to manifest for 30 years, held down by unhelpful beliefs and genetic karma passed to me by my parents. Those are the elements of me I chose to allow to come forth knowing none of the past is worth hanging on to. I am worth more than repeating my parents sad and negative story.

So focusing will continue as long as necessary. This is just another manifestation goal, and one I am certain I’ll achieve in time. My current determination being what it is, it may be much sooner than other manifestations have taken. I don’t like the feeling that my father produces, it makes it really obvious that he has disconnected me from my own source. I think I know how to fix it short term, and every minute of everyday I am able, I will focus on the desired vortex version and allow it to manifest quickly.

I will find a way to allow better.

My Atira is not for the infirm to drag the world down, it is for the healthy to lift the world up.

May you all have very clarifying experiences. May you see exactly what needs to happen to allow better things in your world. May you trust the divine process. May you understand when negativity threatens your mood that it is because you lost sight of your own vortex. May you always find a way to focus on your vortex, even when darkness threatens your life. May you always win the good fight and find alignment with your source. May you know your divine half is always routing for you and that God loves and supports you.

Siva Hir Su

Tao of Watts

One of the great American philosophers, Alan Watts will make you think deeply. He pulls from all major religions, but has a leaning towards eastern philosophy such as Taoism, Buddhism, and Hinduism. This latest video notification to gain my attention seems to fit so well with everything going on in my worldview at this moment. May you have deep feel good moments of clarity. Siva Hir Su

Watch “You Can’t Do Nothing – Alan Watts” on YouTube

My Inner Being View

I listened to some Abraham videos while at work today and it stirred a list of how my inner being sees things. I wanted to share in case it helps you. It might also help to read recent posts to have a bit better understanding of how these relate to reaching for better.

Dad:

  • My dad is a perfect example for me to reach for how I want to be.
  • My dad has been very helpful in finding my best me.
  • My dad is showing me how to really LIVE.
  • Dad is about to chatch up with his higher self in a big way and him and I will both have a much greater understanding. We will both understand more fully and completely when he reconnects with his higher self in totality.
  • He is helping me learn unconditional love, unconditional kindness, and unconditional compassion in a big way. I may have needed the release of yelling at him, but I’m learning that it was more for me than to make any difference in his state of being alive. I can not change him, and I respect myself enough to keep reaching for better.
  • My dad has helped me to be certain of who I am and what my connection to God is.
  • He has made certain that I reclaimed my power.
  • I now know how to stand up for myself completely.
  • I now know how to stand strong and refuse to budge. Not because of unwillingness to change, but because I know what I want and what is in my vortex. I now know how to only change for the better and make certain my choices are respected.
  • I am more certain than ever of my worthiness because I know how bad being ignored and disrespected makes me feel.

Me:

  • I have healed greatly.
  • My body is working better than ever because of God’s healing and guidance.
  • All of my organs are healing and beginning to function closer to optimum conditions.
  • My immune system is working just as God intended for me and it is keeping me very healthy when I act as God intended. It needs no external input.
  • My body is now beginning to produce hormones at optimum levels to encourage further healing and help everything in my body function at it’s best.
  • “I am pure positive energy that must move forward.” – Abraham
  • I am heard and understood by God and by Nathan and others.
  • I am respected and honored by many.
  • My Thyroid is healing and gives me abundant energy, it is helping me burn fat and heal my whole body.
  • I am a beautiful person.
  • I am more flexible than ever.
  • I am stronger than ever.
  • I am healthier than ever.
  • I slimer than ever.
  • My skin gets more beautiful and toned everyday.
  • I am healthy, whole, and complete.
  • I am mostly resistance free.
  • I am positive and I mostly feel good.
  • I am calm and my body is being soothed by God’s healing energy.
  • I am perfect just the way I am. Perfectly imperfect, but always reaching for better. Always reaching for true living.
  • I am most definitely connected to my inner being.
  • I’m feeling better and better and that is manifesting in my experience.

May you have wonderful moments of clarity. May you see things the way your inner being does and know it is helping you to manifest greater in your life. May you know you are doing better ever day you wake up. May you know it is not your time and that God loves you. May you feel that love open your heart in amazing ways. May you learn and practice unconditional.

Siva Hir Su