Tag Archives: divine interaction

Momma is thirsty.

I has been told
Many religions say
There was a great flood
Nearly all life was lost

Momma was hungry
Momma was thirsty
The flood waters
Quenched
The dead
Nourished

Everything small
Feeds
The larger
We are food
To that which
Is larger

When balance is
Lost
Balance
Will be restored

I just is

We did contribute
To imbalance
Now
We must contribute
To balance

All of us will
In some way

Living is determined
On efforts made
To restore
Balance

I'm doing
My best
It's my part
And I know
My momma
Knows

Are you?

~ Treasa Cailleach

“A Tale Dark and Grimm.”

A Netflix original, animated series. I’m watching it with my kids, while doing my best to pull out of my nosedive. It has many good learning lessons in it and just like other shows I’ve watched with my kids lately, it stirred contemplation. I felt like it was making some sense of senseless, for me right now. So, I’m working on it.

  • I want to be me and be safe and be happy.
  • I want to find healing and peace.
  • I want to feel again, especially love, and balance my thoughts with my feelings.
  • I want to enjoy the fun of life and still be safe and happy.
  • I want all my divine masculines/feminines to be healed and safe and happy.
  • I want my divine masculines/feminines¬† to know they were sold by the establishment, in their unique views, to the devil/darkness, and it’s not their fault. We were all duped one way or another.
  • I want my divine masculines/feminines to understand the addiction of the hunt, and find their balance with nature.
  • I want my divine masculines/feminines to balance their feelings with thought and vice versa.
  • I want us all to feel loved and know that the feeling of goodness is the answer.
  • I want my divine masculines/feminines to find their successes.
  • I want my divine masculines and feminines to be healed and more balanced in all ways.
  • I want us all to feel good.
  • I want us all to feel peace and comfortable.
  • More berries, and veggies, but a good mix of all of it. Too much of anything can make you crazy.
  • Even fish is okay in moderation.
  • Too much meat and/or sugar can make you crazy faster, and possibly lead to doom, because it causes imbalance both inside and out.
  • Adventure is only fun when you don’t balme yourself for things going wrong.
  • Find your courage and release your guilt.
  • You have to heal your own broken heart, no one can fit it for you.
  • Filling the void with food, or anyone or anything else, is certain doom.
  • Acknowledge that self has made it through a lot and none of it was intended, but beating the self up for it will only bring more pain.
  • Sometimes sacrifice is necessary to do something genuinely good, but never assume that you have the right reason for something having happened, and again be kind to one’s self for having made the sacrifice.
  • Listening to your heart and instincts may seem weird, but is a really good thing, when intellect- knowing the source- is the moderator to keep your self safe.
  • See the failings of others as reminders to stay focused on your self, know how to avoid the doom they bring.
  • Forgive yourself and others for everything, especially kin and parents.
  • See how those that hurt you were duped or disconnected in some way, their inner self would never have let the hurt happen.
  • See the warning signs, stay connected to the earth, the tree of life, and hear what the rain tells you. The guidance is everywhere if you allow yourself to see, hear and feel it.
  • The charming pirate may stir good feelings, but is more likely to cause disaster than actually fix what has to be healed from within. That is also true of the others with good intentions, but whom carry a slice of their own crazy needing healed.
  • The journey is helpful in finding all the elements of healing that your self needs.
  • In the end, all will be okay.

May¬† you see the helpful information in your experience. May you understand why everything is in your experience. May you figure everything out as quickly as possible to save yourself grief and/or guilt, and be kind to yourself when you don’t. May you know everything and everyone can be healed. May we all feel safe, loved and find our successes. May we all be peaceful and comfortable. May we all have easier days and more things to be grateful for, and find the forgiveness for ourself and others. May life get easier and easier for everyone. May we navigate away from demons and darkness, towards the light and joy life was intended to be. May we all be happily content and having the funest journey of all time. We are all free to choose, and may we all choose the best over the worst. Above all, may we know the divine loves and supports us in all that we do.

Om Shanti

2 was too much.

I should not have had children. I can’t handle the ones I have. I can’t be a responsible parent because it’s killing me. The stress, the worries, but most of all the knowing that I have passed on the traits I tried so hard to stop. I have perpetuated the damage that my parents wrought on me, especially that of my father. I was not able to stop it and I’m watching my children repeat those bad behaviors. Plus I even passed on the resulting disease. Everything I do only seems to make it worse instead of better. I can’t fix this and I wish I’d never caused it to begin with. I should never have had children. I’m sorry, please forgive me. The universe only made it very difficult to bear children, it didn’t eliminate the possibility. I should have given up before I even started. If I had let myself completely go I’d already be dead and there would have never been a child to begin with. I think that was my biggest mistake, trying to fix something that wasn’t worth the effort. I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you. Can I go home now? No more battles, no more striving, no more trying, just peace.


These are the deep dark thoughts of my brain that I do my best to ignore. They eat at me anyway. Bonus I know my father thinks them. You see when I get on the wavelength of these thoughts I even start to take him on. Right now my left foot is swollen and I just had a moment where I felt like I was stuck in his failing body. I lost it on my whiney children because of the 3D reality in front of me, but I felt like I was standing looking at my adult sister. I feel exhausted and just want to sleep and never wake up. My brain is trying to calculate the easiest way to ensure that. I had the realization I should have never lived to begin with, and I can’t take back the love I have for my children, but I felt distinctly like they didn’t give a shit about my existence.

See I don’t have to call my father, because every single negative trigger in my universe takes me front and center to his psyche and his current existence. It literally kills me a little every time it happens, and I use every bit of my being to stay away from it as much as possible.

My real, sane, prayer is that it ends very soon. I can and will heal if it ends. I also pray that the divine fixes what I can’t. My beautiful children deserve the same healing and the same disease to stop. I do love them, I don’t wish any of this negative toxicity on them, but they have already been poisoned. I beg the divine to fix what I can’t. For their sake, for their children’s sake, for the world’s sake.

May you never know the agony of living like this. May you never fight tooth and nail to fix generations old damage. May you never be faced with an invisible force that you are powerless to stop. May you never wish death upon yourself. May you find a way to gain control of what is normally under your will. May you find a way to safely manage those horribly damaging things that aren’t. May we all get through these times and clear the other side safely. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti