Tag Archives: energetics

Reaching for me again.

It’s been a challenge to stay focused on my inner light lately. I have support from those around me, but especially from the acupuncturist. I’m also relying heavily on music, solfeggio frequencies, and mantras. They help, but it’s a continuous process.

I also feel like I’m having to relearn alignment with body changes.

I’m fasting more than ever due to external influences, it seems like the only times I feel really good are when I have not taken anything extra into my body. It’s like food is one thing too much and the toxic levels get too high. The acupuncturist has helped with inflammation and mood imbalances in these shifting times.

And I have made friends with yoga so much that, I’m now striking poses while working on people to attempt to right my pelvic imbalances. I am struggling to correct pelvic tilt and spread now that my hips and tummy are not as heavy. My happy medium, perfect alignment, seems to be fleeting moments when concentration lands specifically on righting my hips. And that is nothing to mention the number of audible joint adjustments that I’m able to hear just from shifting my pelvic region or legs. Unstable is a good descriptor.

Meanwhile, my thoughts center mostly on kicking out that which isn’t mine, be it energetic or actual toxins in my bloodstream. I feel like I have an overabundance of toxins of both kinds lately and I just need them out.  So I focus on toxins being eliminated from my body, my kidneys and liver working well, and energy that isn’t mine being grounded and shielded, at least until relief is felt.

When I am in a more relieved state I do my best to keep it that way by focusing on what is me.

I am a beautiful, human woman. I am strong and intelligent. I like music and laying in the sunshine. I like……. I love everyone around me, always, but even when they don’t return it. I love my pets and my family. I love ….. I appreciate my home and my less stress work. I’m grateful that mostly we have enough. I am thankful for making it through rough times. …..

You get the idea.

My thoughts are more and more on one of these two veins, and less and less on anything else.

Yesterday, I had a moment where one of my power-drains became evident. Someone I am connected to was focusing on the wrongness in the fact that there is only one option, and it’s being forced upon people even though it isn’t doing what was promised anyways. The gist is why don’t people see that the limited being forced, is the problem, and that there could potentially be many solutions if that was allowed, and I don’t disagree. Beyond the fact that it seems very questionable in a “it puts the lotion on it’s skin if it wants to live” sort of way; I personally believe there should be multiple options in this mess and that we all should have the right to choose. Even with one option we still should have the right to choose. That is basic human rights and our freedom, which has been promised to us here in America for 200 years.

However, in the moment of my experience yesterday, it was clear that because my love was being given to that person, and they were in turn focusing on the negative, it was creating a massive drain on my energy and it felt so intense in the moment I thought it would cause me to die if I don’t find a solution. I literally got cold and started shivering from the experienced energy drain, and I was sitting outside in my hammock in near 80° weather. It was very intense and somewhat scary.

As I was verbalizing my thoughts to get them to stick better energetically and hopefully override the experience, my son explained he knew how I felt. He has apparently been having very similar moments and feeling the same things. He told me that he had tried saying some of the same phrases but that they don’t stick well for him. I told him I’m having the same trouble but we have to keep practicing and trying new phrases to find out what works well enough.

I must figure this out quickly to protect my children.

Unfortunately, I know that western medicine is too busy trying to protect their failure to actually focus on producing real solutions. Bonus, no doctor I’ve ever been to, has helped, and that was before energetics and Covid threatened my life. It just doesn’t really leave me any hope that they will help now. I’ve been to the doctor more the last 2 years than the previous 2 decades, yet nothing has improved by their efforts or measures. It’s just not worth my time anymore, and if I’m going to die because of Covid aftermath, I’d rather not waste my time and energy on the medical system anymore. A singular-sighted system, with a fallible injection, trying to serve diverse masses based on mostly-white-male-averages and with absolutely no backup plan, all while dealing with a new disease mutating at an exponential rate (no other disease known to man has done that BTW), is not worth investing anything into.

So, off food, a fraction of my supplements are making it into me these days, doing my level best to keep up with the Energetics, reaching for solutions for me and my children, and maintaining my focus as best as possible to find as much alignment as possible. That’s the short of it.

May you have easy transitions in this time of global change. May you find that all changes in your life and in your body are managed easily. May you see love and support all around you. May you know that you’ll get through this and eventually clear they other side okay. May you know that change is inevitable and sometimes it’s grander than others. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Sense-ative!

Today we took the kids back to Wonderscope. They really do enjoy going there, even masked.

We aimed to just let them play themselves out, and had no set time limit. It was very crowded compared to our initial visit. It seems even though Delta is spreading like wildfire regardless of vaccination or not, people are just over being cooped up. Life is beginning to look normal again, very slowly. Us risky humans, we can only take so much restriction and then all bets are off. It’s a good thing Covid wasn’t worse, because we definitely hit a limit where we’re either at least attempting to enjoy life or we might as well be dead, and once we finally know that we take our chances.

However for me, I’m not sure it’s a good thing. At least just yet.

At about 2 hours in, I began to feel off, and like I was fighting fatigue intensely. I couldn’t explain it because I’d fasted on Thursday all day, and felt pretty darn good before showing up. Plus, I hadn’t had anything that would set off an allergic reaction, as far as I was aware. I was simply perplexed as to why I was suddenly so tired. Yet, it was enough that after contemplation and acknowledging it might not be me, I popped an extra dose of thyroid meds, carefully poking it into my masked mouth.

About 20 minutes later I began feeling nauseous and my head began throbbing. Something definitely felt awry and I was wracking my brain as to what could have possibly triggered this moment. I let my husband know that I wasn’t feeling great, but couldn’t figure out why. He said he was also starting to get tired and we agreed to work on getting children to wrap up. Katherine was showing some intense fatigue as well.

Nathan went to convince her to stop playing and walked up to her right as she smacked another child. The fatigue had won and she let frustration get the best of her. As parents we immediately pulled her aside and scolded her for smacking the child. I knew though that it wasn’t just frustrated acting out. I could see the pattern I experienced starting to show on my family. We quickly gathered everyone and left for the day.

Nathan needed to stop at the hardware store next door before we went home, so the rest of us piled into the van and got settled for the ride home. I simply told Katherine to just be her and relax. I repeated “Just be Katherine, just be you.” a couple of times. Then I started repeating it for myself, “just be me”. I left one foot hanging out of the van to ground anything that wasn’t mine and even said silently to myself “eliminate anything that isn’t me, push everything else out”. I repated those phrases until Nathan came out of the hardware store.

By the time he was settled I was feeling much better. I told him the nausea had backed off to a slight heavy feeling in my abdomen, and the headache was barely noticable.

At that point I was understanding what was happening and explained to him.

I spend all week working one on one, occasionally standing in a group of 8 or less for conversation. The rare occasion I go to a store, it is usually not as busy as Wonderscope was, but even when it is I’m only in the store for a short time. This was the first time I was around that many people for that length of time. I also explained that kids are there having fun, but it is loud and boisterous. Plus, there were nearly as many parents as children, and human parents are usually the ones with the most energetic baggage- the parents are the ones constantly finding things to complain about. Kids are oblivious to a point, but eventually fatigue or energetic impact begins to wear them down too, and they will fall prey to the same patterns but in kids’ form.

I simply had not shielded well enough, and I was like those kids, where the energetic impact wore me down until my body began manifesting it’s pattern equivalent.

Fortunately, I have definitely gotten better at clearing it out, because 10 minutes outside and away from the crowds was all I needed. By the time we arrived back home I had almost completely cleared the energetic clutter of others.

I know as a kid I couldn’t stand to be in large crowds, the mall during Christmas season was most dreaded. It seems I’m almost caught up with young child me. Except now as an adult I understand better what is happening and how to manage the effects. Now if I can either catch it earlier/faster or somehow shield better to avoid it all together, that would be amazing.

Plus there’s: how I could teach this to my kids quicker? They don’t need 30 years of it before they master it on their own. If I can speed that up to 1 or 2 years, that would serve them immensely well and benefit them greatly.

We’ve watched She-Ra, part of Masters of the Universe, all of Troll Hunters, and 3Below. Those shows all explore the unseen world from different perspectives and vocabulary. They have all been helpful to me in fine tuning my tools and vocabulary for how I experience and interact with my world. I’m hoping I can convey to my kids what I see, feel, and understand, and how those things help.

For instance this week I played with visualizing myself differently. I pretended to be like Aaja from 3Below, I saw myself with an extra pair of arms and when I was doing muscle manipulations with my tangible hands, I was doing Reiki and energetic work with my non-tangible visualized hands. I felt like it helped my sessions get just a bit more efficient. For the first ever utilization of such an energetic tool, I felt it was definitely worth doing more of it.

But my 3 year old doesn’t know what all that means. She could benefit from the visualization too, but she needs a 3 year old understanding of it, how to use it and why it would help. I need to put it in play terms and give her ways she could use it interacting with family. If I can figure out how to get Katherine to understand, I know Ian will too, but potentially Ian might get it first. Either way, which ever one gets it first I know they will help the other learn it too.

There’s a dozen more moments like that from the shows that I am still exploring myself and have yet to attempt to help children do so.

These are definitely interesting times, and the shift is getting more and more noticeable for me. I’m beginning to see evidence of it everywhere.

My body is shrinking and healing and it gets stronger, cleaner, healthier and clearer every day. My third eye seems to be nearly fully woke, with fewer and fewer power downs- usually precipitated by general fatigue.

I am working on controlling the energy in useful and positive ways, aiming it at healing myself, followed by all those around me, my community, my country, and my world. I am doing my level best to really be a vortex of ‘Om Shanti’. Most days I am successful all day long, and begin to loose around 5 or 6 pm. I think dinner just doesn’t come fast enough to help counter the full days of work. Energy out must be balanced by energy in. I probably need to start consuming a buffer snack late in the afternoon, because my lunch veggie snack of months just doesn’t make it far enough now. That or more consistently actually take that second smaller dose of thyroid medicine. I need to look at the last round of labs they just drew before I decide that one, if it was still off a bit then that’s the solution for sure. Course it would be better if my thyroid finished healing and I didn’t need either dose anymore.

Balance and patience. In time all will be well.

For now, I’m grateful that I am feeling better and better. I’m grateful that I am healing and I am shrinking. I’m grateful that I have a beautiful family. I’m grateful that I am both intelligent and aware enough, to understand all of this and how to apply it to my life. I am grateful that I’m intelligent enough to hold what still can’t be fully documented by human tools, as worthy of exploration and understanding. I’m grateful that I’m aware of where science has begun to document some of the unseen world, and I look forward to more understanding being gleaned. I’m grateful that I am able to sense my divine half enough to know for certain that there is an unseen magical world. I look forward to being able to control my divine energy, as well as She-Ra was able, when she defeated The Horde. I love feeling good and knowing I’m more aware than ever. I love being able to focus my awareness. I love knowing that I’m healing myself in ways medicine has yet to even discuss because the topic is still considered to far-fetched. I love knowing my efforts are concerted enough to potentially rewrite my DNA, turning off junk DNA for accepting better options. I love the feeling of healing. I love the vibrance of the energy of healing. I love knowing that when what I feel spills forth, it helps everyone around me, and that because it’s like a cup overflowing, there’s only ever flow outward when my cup is full and the flow continues. I love having my cup continually full and still allowing the flow to continue, that is a true healer. The best feeling ever: my divine self- words give pale comparisons, knowing that alone is priceless and sacred.

May you know what you feel, and may it always be exactly as your inner being is. May you have all the tools you need to navigate this world. May you understand all of the ways to experience the world and all of the tools needed to explore it safely. May you know how to adjust and correct when others impact you. May you know exactly where you went wrong and how to fix everything. May you see your inner light burn brightly for all to see as long as you shall choose. May your heart be full of healing love always. Above all may you know the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Heal first.

I’m a slow writer because of dyslexia and I only have 30min to convey what I need to say. I apologize for any typos in advance.

Om Mani Padme Hum … The jewel in the lotus. Your heart sparkles with the jewel of healing. Love yourself for surviving it all. Love yourself for knowing you did wrong and wanting to make it right. Love yourself for doing your best even when traumatized and fighting disease. Love yourself because you matter to god. Love yourself because that is the way to heal everything, inside and out, top to bottom, and all around. You are special and even when you’ve done something horrible there is always a way to heal and make amends. That is our purpose here to make amends for worngs from as many places as possible, even and especially when it is our own misdeeds. Make it right and love yourself even more for doing so.

Heal the world.

Heal our bodies.

Those that survived deserve healing.

Everyone alive deserves healing in whatever that means.

Heal my mystery person. I know they didn’t mean to hurt me, and I know the darkness they carry isn’t theirs. They didn’t deserve it to begin with. They deserve to heal.

Heal my brother, I love him. Our childhood was rough and I wouldn’t have made it through without him. I know we have both hurt each other many times over the years and I hope he forgives me because I know I forgive him. He was traumatized more than I, and he managed to survive and have a family. He deserves healing as much as anyone.

Heal my husband. I love him too. He is my light and my love and has always been there for me when I needed loving support. He deserves to be fully healed.

Heal my mom and dad in whatever way that means. They did their best and I forgave them years ago. I love them. They deserve healing.

Heal the system to actually help people the ways that matter. We need answers and fixes for disease damage. We need treatments that first do no harm, and the system needs to put those treatments first and cover them as much as any treatment. There should also be balance and equality in what is offered and covered, if Viagra can be covered for men than abdominal reconstruction should always be covered for women.

We are alive and breathing in this moment. This is our chance to try again. If we all work together and focus on what is needed then we will overcome.

I have had a week of low backs and hips, everyone that has been on my table has struggled with it in some fashion. Feeling safe and secure and like we can move forward is at the heart of that problem. Heal everyone so that they know it is safe to move on in Whatever that means for them. Heal them so that they know they are supported and secure in themselves.

Heal every ion, every atom, every molecule, every cell and organ of every living being in this world. Anything that isn’t truly alive can be transformed into something helpful. Nothing is created or destroyed, but all can be transformed into their best selves and heal.

I call all the archangels, I call of Christ, I call on Shiva, all the divine beings and great masters from all time. Hear my prayers, hear all of our prayers. We deserve healing and we deserve help and now is the time to do so. We are reaching for you help, let it be so.

May we all know that we are loved and supported by the divine. May we all survive this shift. May we all heal and live better lives. May we all know we are loved and forgiven. May we all see the light and allow for miracles in everything.

Om Shanti

Peace to all in the universe.