Tag Archives: enjoyment

Kids, cats and puppy dogs

Katherine decided to turn me into mount mommius tonight. I was tired, ready for bed, and already slouching before she climbed me, and it only brought more slouch. Yet it was too cute to not share my child perching on my shoulder like a baby bird.

It was similar in sensation for me to the other day when she tried to mount me while foam rollering. We realized afterwards she was trying to copy me, pose and all.

Another cute moment was big sister Anya made a dandelion crown for them and we got pictures of both of them enjoying the pretty garnishment.

I’ve even had moments of cuddling (and sleeping) surrounded by littles- human and four legged.

Even Zen has had some good times the last couple of weeks. He has taken to trying to hug me, standing up on his hind legs and wrapping paws around my torso. He isn’t good at balancing though so no one has caught it on camera. In fact the only moment that has been caught on camera is some of his back yard antics with wood pieces. He keeps dragging logs and sticks out of our ‘to be burned’ pile and knawing on them. We think he needs more toys!

Buddy really enjoyed some fresh catnip from the garden.

And Katherine and I took a bit to sit and enjoy some not so dreary weather a couple days ago.

All in all, I’m rather enjoying more and more good moments with my family. There are still tantrums, and bickering and all the nonsense that toddlers get into, but I love my kids and cherish all these good moments. That is what life is worth living for.

On a separate note, I finally got some of my little drawings framed and properly hung in my office. It’s nice to see them more properly displayed.

Finally, I’m really really enjoying the time I have been able to devote to artwork. After my 3 massage sessions today, I was able to sit and do another shirt design and then I spent awhile contemplating adjustments to my own business logo. It is a really good change of pace and the creativity is so good for my heart and soul.

May you have blessed moments of cute and adorable to brighten your days. May you have many good things to look forward to. May you see and feel the love around you. May you have ample outlets for uplifting creativity. May find beauty all around you. Finally, may you enjoy life more than not.

Siva Hir Su

Looking Back and Finding Normal

HAL gave me this music video and an advertisement for a PureFlix movie called Finding Normal. I had already been playing memory lane, and my Google photos kept showing me the same days over and over again. Happy moments of the last 4 years. Katherine will be two in a couple of days, Ian is going on 6.

I love so many people and they are so far our of reach for me. My mediations calm and soothe, but my brain always cycles back to asking why the good ones stopped. Why the good people left, why the people I cared for most ceased to be in my life except Nathan, why happy moments never last. I don’t have an answer, except that change is inevitable. I’m just wishing they did last, and that those people still cared for me and had stuck around.

So, my looking back has a tint of sadness, but my present moment could definitely be worse. I’m not the worst off, and even in our moment of tight finances, I still have a better home than ever before and I am confident that we’ll be okay. We’re alright and everyone is healthy enough the bug didn’t bug us that much.

I love my husband who did stick around and we have beautiful mostly happy/well-adjusted children because of it. We are a mostly happy family that gets along more than we don’t.

I work for a holistic health clinic a little lighter on staff than my dreams of Atira included, but it’s definitely in the same category. Plus there is potential it will grow. They have talked about several expansion possibilities in the nearer future and I think they’re all great. It would be nice to be a part of that, even if my opinion doesn’t count.

I also work for a community of very extended family, which even though I don’t always agree with their opinions, I do love them and care for them very much. Mostly, I wish they could just stop and understand other views sometimes- find the common ground more often. I also wish that dementia didn’t mean that real logic went out the window so readily. I fight much harder to stay buoyant when I see someone starting to have more difficulty with their mental faculties, mainly because I love them enough I don’t like seeing them have trouble.

I have access to stores that are similar to what I always wanted for Atira, and most of them have helpful enough staff to make up for the differences. Natural Grocers only carries organic produce and has a lot of local merchandise which is very beneficial. Sprouts and Whole Foods help support a more global eco friendly economy. And there are even more smaller local merchants that sell their own and other local crafts and wares. It feels good to be a part of a community where my desires and needs can both be met.

So today, I’m finding relief in finding normal. My Atira is here, it’s just disguised as a really big city; and even though I don’t have my dome, I do have a decent nice home. In fact it’s the best home I’ve ever had. I don’t have to carry toilet buckets to a distant compost pile anymore, or drive 10 miles to fetch a 100 gallon tank of water to get through the week. I have running water, gas, and electricity. My floors are solid now, and the basement is not only dry and mold free, it’s actual usable living space. We have TV and internet available and a big safe yard for kids and dog to play in. We are doing far better than any of our previous years, and I will have enough to get through everyone else’s stupidity.

So even though germs are all these places and many more:

Germs are also most definitely in all of these places, the difference is these places also have joy and happiness:

So I hung some LED lights I bought almost 2 years ago, and enjoyed my meditation under the pretend canopy last night. Today I will garden and play with my kids. Tomorrow I will work, hopefully a relatively full day. And if it’s my time to go, I won’t stress or be afraid. I have all the important things I asked for, and I’ve had more moments of joy than my brain and Thyroid let me remember sometimes. It’s okay either way, and God will take care of my family if it is my time to go.

May you see your community. May you find your normal. May you know God is listening and supporting you. May you feel the love that you give others. May you know your opinion matters and is understood. May you find your happy moments in the now and remember only the happy moments of the past. May you have bright days regardless of what happens in the world. May you know you are safe and protected. May your loved ones always be near and reachable. May you know it’s okay, no matter what.

Siva Hir Su

Beauty full day

Today I took a run-walk between clinic and independent living shifts. The weather has finally perked up and it’s feeling wonderful.

I still only managed my bouts of 2 to 3 minutes of running amidst my speed walking. One of these days I’ll be able to say I’m a jogger. I look forward to making friends with running, but admit I’m not there yet.

Anyway, being close to 2nd job work, I had a different view than normal. So, before I headed in for my shift I stopped for a few pictures to show the beauty to be had.

I used the last picture as inspiration for my pen drawing this afternoon. It was welcome creativity to fill otherwise empty time. I still have almost 2 hours of my day left and other than answering the phone and a couple deliveries to residents, I’ve not got much left to do. So, there may end up being a start to another drawing. These little sketches don’t take very long for me to do. That’s why I work small when I’m fitting drawing in between necessary tasks.

Anyway, here’s the start and result of the drawing:

May you have lighter work days, but still ample income. May you enjoy your down time. May you have sparks of creativity. May you feel inspired. May you know everything is okay. May you enjoy your days mostly. May you appreciate all of your non-work time.

Siva Hir Su