So, I like loud music. Period. Not all the time, but enough of the time I probably annoy others.
Partly because I actually love feeling the music in my body, the percussion and resonance soothe me. It’s a side effect of having been a serious band geek as a kid.
Also partly because the music seeps in more quickly when it’s loud, so I use it to drown out the rest of the world and it’s intrusive energies. Plus there is a little hearing loss from having two screaming babies on top of decades of loud music, though all things considered- really not much hearing loss.
Anyway, today I invoked loud for another workout. I again was able to leave work early, and I’m pushing myself at every opportunity because I really do want to feel better. I’m still on the fence emotionally, so every effort is counting big time. I am doing my best to maximize my climb back up at every possible opportunity. It still seems to be excruciatingly slow progress.
The two tracks that seemed to help the most are linked below.
They helped me in many ways. I was able to focus on speed on the treadmill, and both tracks have messages that help me focus mentally. The Prodigy track utilizes a mantra I have benefited from, and had a good message about making a new better world. And keep hope alive- that’s pretty self explanatory. They are both in my personal music collection, and they were not the only tracks I listened to, but just the ones that seemed to help the most today.
So other than some Jello legs from two intense workouts in a row, I’m starting to feel better. It’s still going more slowly than I’d like, but I’ll keep pushing until I get back to normal.
If I could eliminate certain feelings it’d be easy. But I still have certain things eating at me and I’m not sure if they’re old ingrained patterns resurfacing (despite previous efforts to kill them), or if I’m picking up on other’s similar patterns. Either way I can’t seem to kick them out permanently yet. I’ll keep trying like I always do.
May you have good exercise, stable mental health and feel generally good. May you have several someones you can rely on when things get difficult for you. May you always have tools readily available to help solve whatever problem you are facing.