Tag Archives: fun

How did I use my powers for good?

That was Nathan’s question to me this evening. He was trying to figure out how to reel in our children when they get a bit intense. But I think it also pertains to my now.

Here were my anecdotes.

I told him, just what you see: art, music, sunshine, playing outside, pets, meditation. All the things I do now for calm or serenity.

Then I elaborated.

I told him of playing school or playing house. Building huts out of dining chairs and blankets. Sometimes my brother was told to humor me and play with me, but often I pretended alone, and my checkers bear and other stuffies would take the place of my family or students.

We often played in the sandbox together, running matchbox cars and construction equipment to build a little town. The houses simply being broken plastic Easter eggs, or other objects.

My childhood meditations were laying in sunbeams watching dust flecks float. I told myself they were fairies’ dust.

I colored and painted and drew pictures galore, burning through dozens of coloring books, but also watched Bob Ross everyday when mom slept- up until I started school.

I played on my tiny keyboard for hours, sometimes playing the same handful of notes over and over again. Mom also played music for me. My most notable musical memories were:

1) the Sesame Street kids song album, especially Bert and Ernie’s “Rubber Ducky Song”

And

2) the Burl Ives “Little White Duck” album, especially the song “Muffin Man”

I remember those two albums played on repeat most days. These days my musical repitoire is much more diverse.

Pets, they did everything with me, at least that was inside. (Our kitties growing up were indoor only.) My one kitty even begrudgingly let me dress her in doll dresses, and once in a while I could get her to lay in the doll stroller/crib, though she barely even fit. She was my constant companion and first non-familial love. She was also my reprieve from all the things that stressed me in any way or brought me down emotionally.

I played Barbies and my brother would come wage war on them with his GI Joe’s. When he’d blow them up with a pretend bomb, I would end up with dismembered Barbies that I was incapable of putting back together. I would run crying to Mom and she’d make him fix them. Eventually my Barbies had been exploded so many times they wouldn’t stay together right and legs would just fall off in trying to dress them.

I remembered playing tag of a wide variety with neighbor kids, “hide and go-seek” too. Often running like mad through several yards.

When we got a little older we began collecting legos and I spent many hours of many years building things with legos. I again made lots of houses.

I would hike up dirt piles like mountains, playing king of the mountain with my brother. I would also play under the porch in my own little pretend world.

We built snow forts in winter and had fun snowball fights. My brother would drag me around in the sled because no hills ever existed for us- we didn’t live by any and in winter it was always too dark by the time dad was home to drive to any.

In the summer we swam at the lake and played on the beach, our first access to a pool was when I was in 4th grade and we took swimming lessons for the first time.

Even in school, many of my favorite activities were these handful but brought to current variations with my age. Those are the essential activities that brought me much joy in my childhood.

It seems my handful is still accurate, but now includes yoga and salt baths. I am appreciative that I’ve been able to regain access to my lost loves these past few years. Adulting is much more fun when your spirit gets to play a little.

May you have fun moments of play, even in adulthood. May you see your memories of fun activities as pertinent to your now. May you appreciate the things that bring you joy. May you find your children’s favorite things, and share in the joy those things being to your kids. May you find activites you all share enjoyment of. May you see that God loves and supports you in all things.

Om Shanti

InkTober 3rd + 4th

Since I’m so busy I got caught in a two-fer moment. I saw the 3rd prompt of bulky and had trouble deciding what to draw. So much so that several failed attempts later, the 3rd was already drawing to a close, pun intended. I looked at the prompt for the 4th and saw radio.

Suddenly it hit me, boom-boxes from my childhood were bulky radios that people carried around the neighborhood to stir up some fun. It was a win win drawing, accomplishing both prompts and would count whether I finished it tonight or tomorrow.

As luck has it, I managed to finish this evening.

The original image is actually a screenshot of a modern duplicate of those old boom-boxes, but in my drawing I ignored the USB port and digital play buttons.

My drawing mostly done:

Finished image; micron pigma pen on Strathmore cold press watercolor paper. Approx. 3.75″ x 3.75″

I’m a hard critic on myself sometimes. The point at which I stopped to take the half done snapshot, I noticed the slight incongruences. I half wanted to start over, but stopped myself. I decided instead to comment that charcoal allows for corrections, but ink you either love your mistakes or start over. In this instance I choose to love my uniquely me mistakes. A bully radio boom-box from my childhood.

May you have good creative moments with less self criticism. May you enjoy your moments of creativity and go easy on yourself. May you mostly have fun, drawing or not.

Siva Hir Su

I need LIFE.

Social media has been invading my space lately. My close circle of friends and family have been telling of things heard and seen, and blog-o-sphere is passing around “awards” that are really just new renditions of chain-mails which used to pass via Facebook and email. I seem to be being inundated, and on top of all the continued Covid stuff, it leaves me with a much stronger desire for life itself.

You see, these social media games are not life. They are merely feel good tidbits masquerading as social interaction. None of these moments will last and many will be forgotten by next week. They will simply become an old blip in some server that time forgets.

I need things that are more tangible. Memories that are remembered fondly for years to come. I have a whole host of memories already, and I have people I genuinely care about in my here and now, with which to create new memories continuously.

I have a loving husband, whom I told over lunch that I wish to give him an overdue massage tomorrow. I enjoy physical contact and the focus it brings and all too often we allow kids and pets and electronics to be a distraction. So out of love, I requested he make plans to set aside a couple of hours tomorrow for us to have focused time with each other. I will give him a massage just like my clients get every other day of the month. We might take just a little more time for conversation or cuddling- we are spouses after all, but I knew it was time for something very tangible and very focused, and I took the initiative to make a solid plan.

It is not our only attempt, we have date nights frequently. However, date nights involve food and atmosphere and other types of distraction, so I simply wanted a more focused moment for this week.

Those public interactions like date night are still part of my interactive life, and still vital to my experience. They are also fond moments and memory makers. They let me feel connected to this world and like I am a part of it.

It may seem silly, but I’ve actually become fond of people giving me the look that I know is based in judgement. That look that conveys “what is that woman wearing” or “why doesn’t she shave”. Those moments validate my existence in this world, and tell me I am leaving some sort of mark. I have caused a ripple that who knows where it will lead. Sometimes I wonder if I am leaving the positive ripple I hope to, but I know I frequently challenge people’s ideas and paradigms. Even if that is the totality, just the challenge I present, I still feel like it at least helps others examine their own self. Perhaps in that moment I contribute to minds becoming more open, and more possibilities manifesting. I like that feeling.

I also enjoy watching others interact and trying to figure out how people might be connected. Are they co-workers or on a date, are they friends or family? It lets me see that my little life is merely one of very many in this world. A world full of people that God loves and wants the best for. A world full of people sperated by just a few degrees of acquaintances.

But LIFE is soooo much more.

Life is smiles and hugs. Life is seeing your children be born and learning new splendid things. Life is being there for the grumpy old man that has made sure you can’t get him to drop the grumpy and find any shred of happy; and even with him doing his best to drag you down with him. Life is helping your mom when she’d rather hide. Life is helping a friend try to decided if a lump is scary or harmless. Life is getting drunk with a friend because she was dumped and needs a shoulder to cry on. Life is parties and birthdays and anniversaries. Life is shopping and errands and finding fun ways to flow money. Life is going to the zoo and taking walks in parks. Life is watching the birds and smelling the flowers.

Life is everything around us and there are so many good splendid things that if you hide in fear of anything you will miss them all.

That is what I need more than ever. I need the interactions, the dates, the destinations, the real people in front of me for better or worse. I need the birds and the bees and the flowers and trees. I need exercise and sun and rain. I need to breathe fresh air, even at risk of breathing pollen, mold or viruses. I would rather live a good enjoyable life at risk than hide in fear and miss everything. I might die younger from the risks, but will have enjoyed more of my time here on this planet.

There are so many things I wish to do with my life. Even beyond my dreams of building my community and business Atira.

I wish to travel and see more of this world. Talking to my client this morning reminded me of that. He had seen Western United States, and I’ve seen the Eastern half, so we were telling each other of memorable enjoyable things we’d done. It reminded how much of this world I have not seen, but which I very much want to. I can not do that if I’m busy hiding in fear.

I personally do not do well stuck at home looking at the same walls day in and day out. Even when my children were born and my midwife told me I needed to rest and recuperate, my body simply would hit a wall where I needed sun, fresh air and movement. I simply had to go be part of the world even though I was not strong enough to work or do any strenuous activity. I needed to know there was a reason for my existence in the world.

You see if you don’t interact with the world God can not experience the world through your perspective. Even monks in monasteries participate in the world and interact with life, even if it is just a butterfly in a garden or other monks. Trying to hide from the world closes you off, affects your senses and slows the connection to God.

I know for certain that I am not alone in this perspective or paradigm. It may not be completely accurate for everyone, but it is accurate for many. I see it in my residents. Those that have found a way to get out and continue to experience at least part of this world are far less affected than those that have been sequestered in permanent quarantine. Permanently quarantined people are declining at alarming rates, while those that found a way to stay active have mostly managed to maintain their health.

There is a part of our being that needs to go and do, it is part of the human experience of this 3D physical perspective. If you deny that part of the self in a long term or permanent sort of way it literally degrades your physical health because you disconnect from that which you are.

Be in your self and honor every bit of yourself; from food to sunlight to movement to social atmosphere and friends and family. It’s a big puzzle, and sometimes it can be a little overwhelming to try and keep it all together, but if you reach for the fun of it, every moment becomes worth it. Your memories will remind you of all of the good you experienced for doing so, and even the risks become worth it.

May you see all of life as valuable. May you overcome your fears. May you know the risks are worth it. May you know it’s not your time because you have too many things you still wish to do and experience. May you know your days give God much needed input. May you know you are here for a reason and your perspective matters. May you enjoy life mostly. May you know you are loved and supported and that there are many around you whom you wish to interact and make memories with. May you feel your place in this world and enjoy your life mostly.

Siva Hir Su