Tag Archives: happy solstice

Colors

On this Christmas day I think of my family. I chose not to call any of them because I disappoint them by not being simply a “regular Christian” like them. They don’t understand how I call myself pagan, celebrate yule, and still celebrate Christmas.

Mainly it’s because I educated myself enough to know that Christianity stole a lot from earlier peoples in an effort to convert people. I also understand that Jesus came to save us by teaching us what we were already looking at and ignoring (see the withheld Gnostic Gospels). Several religions already had books and teachers, teaching how to get to our divine selves, and there have been several ascended masters sent before Christ, all to show it could be done. Yet, the masses were doing anything but. Christians, Jews and Islamics, constantly fighting wars over the same damn book and a central patch of land. Other peoples fighting other wars over similar stupid reasons. 2000 years after Christ we’re still missing the point, and so now we’re in the midst of a colossal learning lesson for all of humanity. I wish I had more hope that everyone will get it for once. It seems every couple thousand years God really hits a point where he needs us to get the message or die and start over. I don’t blame the divine for hitting that wall, we very much created this mess and expect the divine to fix it for us.

I had a conversation with a client about details of that, and I must have put a massive chink in the layers of his ingrained box, because between him and his wife I received roughly $200 in tips. I’m grateful for the cash as it was very needed, but my goal was not tips, my goal was healing for both of us, and helping him see healthier more accepting ways to view things. I must have had the desired effect, and I’m grateful that the divine supported me in conveying what he needed to hear and understand. I wish I had that ability with my own flesh and blood more often.

Regardless, I do still believe in Christ and still refuse to call myself Christian. I refuse to participate in the politics of religion. I do intend to be as authentic as possible, work on myself as much as possible, and heal myself and my universe as much as possible. I can be the change this world needs to see- with enough practice. Christ taught that God could be found “in a grain of sand or a blade of grass, in the sun in your eyes or the wind on your face”, that the divine was everywhere and that we were responsible for being divine children spreading light and love, compassion, understanding, and healing.

Yet, I still find that moment manifest in Eastern philosophical practices, far more often than practiced by any one of the desert seat religions. None are perfect, all religions have flaws, and there are exceptions to every rule, but percentages seem to imply that the eastern peoples have a bit better understanding of that responsibility and how to accomplish it.

Anyway, after a play doh based conversation over color with Katherine, my client exchange before the holiday, and feelings regarding birth family, it is stirring my creativity. Perhaps I can convey, with a little divine assistance, another message of acceptance on this Christmas evening.

Colors

In the beginning
There was an
Abundant
Array
Beautiful
Uniqueness
Everywhere
Something to
Appreciate
Regardless of
Where
Gaze
Feelings Or
Descriptions
Landed

Mistakes were made
Punishments levied
People hurt
A vicious cycle
Begun
Intent on
Even
Level
Sameness
If all are same
No one can make
Mistakes
Based on others'
Rules
Or ignorance therein
If all are same
Doing the same
Then no punishments
Need be levied

Yet once colors
Become so blended
The result
Is quite
Boring
Bland
Undesirable
Somewhere between
Mud
Or 50 shades
Of murky
All uniqueness
Lost to
An icky
Mixed up
Mess

The bright
Colors
Of individual
Spirit
Is what we
Really
Long for
Everyone
Tapped
Into their
Band of
Rainbow
Into their
Vibration
Of goodness

The mistakes
Which prevent
Connection
To one
Unique
Source
Of gifted
Inspired action
Are punishment
Enough

Difficulty
Lies in
Reaching
Maintaining
Your piece
Of vibrant
Beautiful
Rainbow

Perhaps
Helping
Each other
Reach their
Beautiful
Self
Potential
Is far more
Appropriate
Than fighting
Over rightness
Or waging war
Over
Perceived wrongs

Rainbows
Of light
Bring joy
Always
Not just
When bulbs
Are strung

See
Appreciate
The beautiful
Array
Of colors
Uniqueness
Everywhere
In everything
And everyone
And you'll
Find your
Rainbow
Of God
Here
Now
This day
Always

~Treasa Cailleach

* The picture is my children under “The Magic Tree” in Lee’s Summit. It’s 5 min from our house, and I’m grateful to be so close to a beautiful celebration of living color and holiday magic. It’s a perfect blending of all things holiday and joyful unique colorful expression.

May we all have a magic tree in our life. May you have a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Kwanza, Joyful Dwali (belated), Happy Yule, Savory Solstice, Happy Ramadan and Happy New Year. May you welcome everyone and support their holidays as their way to celebrate this world, all goodness, and the divine. May you see and feel how to connect yourself with your Self. May the rainbow of uniqueness fill your world with awe and wonder always. May you be present and find the healing you seek in the now. May you enjoy holidays of all kinds knowing they help people feel a sense of belonging, love and light. May you see your way past the politics of religion and sameness. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Happy Holidays, Om Shanti

The Magic Tree; Lee’s Summit, MO

Waiting.

In the waiting room, being patient during Nathan’s GI scope. I already went for coffee and decided it was best to just sit patiently in a comfortable chair, and wait.

Hallmark channel was on one of their sweet, but somewhat cheesy Christmas movies. Of course there were blatant plugs for holiday gift giving. I have several people in my life I would love to gifts to this year, which ressources dictate as not being purchases. They deserve far more than I could hope to give using finances, as they have helped me get through what ultimately has been a rough year.

After a ping of sadness over that fact, I started thinking, reaching for options. I can still accommodate gifts, but I’m going to have to invest a few moments of my time and get creative.

I’m working on the second half of the commissioned drawings, so that is my significant time investment, but I already own a multiplicity of art and jewelery supplies which I could put to good use for creating gifts. I know enough about preferences that I should be able to accommodate something for nearly everyone. 2 potential exceptions might require a bit more thought or output effort.

2 weeks to create and deliver. It is possible.

That beating said, I’m going to give myself kudos and be kind to myself if I miss the mark. Better late than never.

I really have made it through a rough year. Stress, health hits for my entire family, financial strain, schedules and transportation taxed to the limits, and my personal puzzle getting much harder to accommodate and balance. I have become more sensitive to foods, and have had to continue to make adjustment after adjustment to maintain my sanity, and health, as best as possible. I fell hard a couple of times, but ultimately at the end I’m still standing because of a handful of people in my work and personal life.

They all deserve to be honored for their impact.

I hope my choices will convey my gratitude fully and appropriately, in a way that they understand completely.

May you never have years where you question your sanity or ability to keep going. May you always have the resources needed and desired. May you have ample ways to show your gratitude. May you have more than enough time to accommodate all the ways you wish to express your gratitude. May your creativity always be appreciated. May your gifts always be perfect and well received. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Yule Merriment

I just wanted to share our Yule Celebrations (Solstice/longest night). Being pagan from Christian families, we celebrate both holidays.

We don’t buy presents twice over, and in fact I collect them all year long as I have a few dollars to spare here and there. However, we do split them into more than one night of gift opening for kids enjoyment, and also to draw out the suspense and excitement.

Because of my mom’s creativity growing up, and her thrifty skills, I’ve gotten very creative making a few dollars look like an abundant spread. Plus, I learned long ago that dollar store bags and tissue paper make gifts look much larger.

It all adds to the view and feeling of a prosperous holiday season, which in turn gets kids very happy and excited (and a little naggy).

Finally, we always save a few gifts and the stockings, so that Santa can visit us too. This year a client suggested we use the ash from our fireplace to make boot tracks where Santa would drop the gifts and enjoy a cookie. I loved the idea so much we’re totally doing it, and I’ve made several fires to make sure we’d have plenty of ash. It’ll be a mess to clean up later but totally worth it.

I just watched “Polar Express” with my two littles and I think it’s just what we needed to spark some more magic in our home and family. Playing Santa for my kiddos will stir their magical creativity for sure.

Nathan and Anya even made gluten free vegan cookies for Santa. Shortbread and peanut butter carob chip cookies- yum! Ian and Katie helped with the peanut butter cookies. Now he’s working on gluten free pumpkin doughnuts. Double yum!

Anyways, I’ll put pictures in a clump below.

May you have a magical holiday season and enjoy abundant gift giving. May your children appreciate all their gifts no matter how much resources it took to compile. May you know you always have enough and that your gifting choices are perfectly chosen. May you feel confident in your holiday preparations. And above all, may the Magic of this season fill your hearts and inspire great things in all those you love and care for. May we all feel our connection to the divine goodness this holiday season. May you know you are loved and cared for.

Om Shanti

Early Decorating for Joy

I decided to be an early bird. This year needs a little more cheer and light, and a week before I normally decorate is nothing. I might even leave them up until my birthday next February, we’ll see if I get sick of them before that. For now the extra pretties are very welcome.

This morning started with pancakes and dog loves. Even though Zen is a fairly large dog, he loves giving me hugs, and I don’t mind except when his paw catches a boob wrong. He loves me a lot, and I find him quite adorable.

Then once I got dressed decorating commenced. I got very sentimental and teary eyed when I realized this is the first holiday season I’ve been able to decorate my own home (not a rental house or apartment). It made up for the holiday seasons that we had nothing, and not even an good home.

Anya fluffed and lighted our cheap artificial tree. We’ve talked about having a fresh tree, but I am tapped out cash wise at the moment so that’s how we ended up with the one we did. As we were pulling decorations out of storage we discovered some damaged and broken, and some burnt out lights, but fortunately we had enough to do a good job decorating.

We all took turns putting ornaments on the tree, and I hung lights as many places as we could. We left two strings for outside and a tiny string for our wreath outside. Nathan will hang those sometime in the next few days. I got really emotional after doing the sliding door because it was so pretty.

Afterwards I spent some quality time with littles and kitties. It was a good day and my home feels like a home for holiday celebrating.

May you have fun decorating for holiday cheer. May you have plenty of quality time with your family. May beauty bring you joy and warm your heart. May you house feel like home. May you love your life and find reasons to celebrate. May you celebrate with joy and peace regardless of whether your home welcomes 2 or 20 or more. May you have everything you need and much that you want. May you know that God loves and supports you.

Om Shanti

I know I’ve said it before.

I told Nathan I was sorry that I’m not able to manage the grand dream of Atira, but that I’d do my best to get a tiny plain Jane version going with our new home. I reiterated that I sincerely love him and always have.

I’m moving in into accepting that it’s just me and Nathan… And God’s help.

I saw a license plate that said ‘I setld’; in full English that’s “I settled”. I probably am doing that, I am giving up on reaching for my big dream. I tried and got my heart broken several times over. I’m deciding that I don’t think I can handle anymore of that and I’d rather go small and find some results, than go big and end up feeling alone and heart-broken again. Dreams can remain dreams. I’ll live in my fantasy inside my thoughts, like when I was a schoolgirl being scolded for daydreaming too much. It’s my easy way of finding creativity, at least when I’m not too busy functioning in daily life.

This Yule I am going to love me for my endurance and intelligence. I’m going to love me for still caring even after everything I’ve been through. I love me for putting family first. I love me for supporting those I love: Nathan, Anya, Ian, Katherine, and pets (even those people that left). I love me for continuing to work so hard and diligently. I love me for continuing to reach for another slightly better step.

This Yule evening, I lit candles and incense on the altars for Lord Shiva. I said a prayer essentially apologizing for being so dense, but thanking the divine presence for attempting to help me anyway. I acknowledged that I knew I was slowing the flow, but can’t seem to heal my brain enough to fix that, and my puzzle is just too complex to maintain perfectly every waking moment. I just want the divine to know I’ve tried and I honor and respect all the divine help I’ve been blessed with.

To celebrate, we decorated with live trees I can plant later in our new yard. We adorned them in LED lights and a few ornaments. And set the table with my decopage plates from last year’s craft activity.

Anya’s gift to us was a homemade meal of pomegranate citrus salmon with roasted brussel sprouts and honey carrots. And we had a toast of sparkling cider.

In the morning Pagan Santa (the original-a jolly elf king) will deliver a very few toys and clothes to my little ones, and a card-game and treat-giftcard to Anya. I found new bras and undies for myself (another first in over a decade), and Nathan couldn’t find anything he really wanted, swearing he feels blessed regardless.

It is a small impromptu Yule to compensate for changes in plans outside of our control.

May you have solid plans with happy family celebrations to bring all your loved ones close for the holidays. May you feel support and love all around you. May you find your healing and allow the flow of God and good to be abundant always. May your home feel like home and may you always find your holidays comfortable. May you have joyous holidays this year and always.

Happy Yule, Joyous Solstice, Blessed Kwanzaa, Happy Hanakha, and Merry Christmas, etc.!

Blessings and much love. Siva Hir Su