Tag Archives: hear me

Brain Relations

Anecdotal. Based on 1st and 2nd hand accounts in my experience. Take it with a grain of salt.

I’ve already talked about the cvid attacking whatever weak spot someone had. I’ve also already discussed my theory that it sped up manifestation of vibrational patterns.

An example of both; I’ll use Nathan, even though he’ll hate it (sorry honey). He has a pattern of “trying to” learned in youth, and hard to break (same as my patterns). Louise Hay stated in her book that the energy of trying can be a cause of kidney problems and she listed affirmations to solve it- when she wrote the book in the 80’s. The energetics of trying, eventually leads to kidney disease and Louise noted it decades ago, and figured out how to heal it. Nathan caught cvid and between the energetics he carried and meds he took, kidneys was his weakness. It was the first and most drastic hit of his cvid experience. What would have taken an entire lifetime to readily show dis-ease before, was shortened into less than a year.

I’ve seen the pattern repeatedly in everyone I come in contact with, and in their particular variation. But there’s more.

I’ve now had a couple clients mention “Covid Brain” as now being a noticed thing, awareness of it, but no full diagnosis or treatment. I suggested, at first mention, that it’s because doctors are happy to supply antidepressants, but if cvid actually caused damage to the brain it’s not going to be solved by prozac.

But it got me to thinking, especially with my battle and how it manifests. What if it is even more than that.

Because of cvid, I am now an open conduit to others energies, and have picked up on all my ailing relatives, pretty much every client leaves an energetic trail in my body, and even coworkers are impacting my awareness in big ways. I hold none of them responsible, it is just one way cvid affected me, and something I am actively managing. At the same time, I have a hell of a time kicking out negative thoughts. I’ve mentioned all this before. It has made my daily routine cumbersome in an attempt to keep myself up and afloat. I’ve also mentioned before that one of the ways I solve it, is to kick it out as if it was a person in me. Statements like “you are not me and I deserve better”. For the ailments, statements like “this nausea isn’t mine, get the eff out”. It has worked, so I keep doing it. It’s even worked on a bit of toe fungus that suddenly appeared about a month ago. I had a moment where I simply knew it wasn’t mine, and went with it. I mentally and verbally rejected it and now it’s cleared up on its own.

Then there’s this awareness that people are not-so-gradually losing their minds and behaving in atrocious ways, in public, online, everywhere. There are no filters anymore, and people are not-so-gradually getting more and more ludicrous and rediculous.

It has made me think. My brain does that; I respond by analyzing everything from every angle, especially when attempting to produce solutions.

The human brain is the closest thing to a computer that we have outside of electronics. I am not in IT, but have had more than one device killed by electronic viruses. I was in highschool when the Trojan was deleveloped and was crashing computers left and right. I understand the basics of how most computer viruses work.

And I see a parallel.

Computer viruses attack the weakest point and utilize the system to replicate to their own advantage, disabling the system to do anything else. They use whatever available to encourage not just the process, but replication to other devices.

I’m beginning to think that cvid has done just that, but with the human brain and body.

It infiltrated via whatever was our weak point. Nathan was kidneys; for me was thyroid, immune, and brain function itself.

Then once in, it started churning out negative thoughts to encourage other weaknesses to become noticable. I’m beginning to wonder if Nathan’s kidneys took a minor hit (why it took them so long to diagnose), and then the negative thought loop of the virus caused the ship to sink so to speak, and caused the sudden need for dialysis.

It would also explain, how even though I know I have worked my ass off to fix my health, I’m suddenly susceptible to other’s symptoms and had toenail fungus out of nowhere.

If your brain has really been hijacked and you don’t even know, then how can anything be healed. See the problem is many of our thoughts are nonverbal in nature and many of them control organ and body function.

You don’t think “kidneys please clean out my blood today and remove all the toxins”. Your brain just tells them to do so, and a particular chemical storm enables the process.

Now imagine instead, that the entire process is being controlled by a virus that intends to hoard everything it desires (toxins and nutrients alike), starve your body &/or organs of what is needed, and keep you alive just long enough to spread the virus further.

So now your kidneys are told go into standby function, and you don’t even know it, you weren’t aware anything changed, and it isn’t something you can see the results of immediately.

What then? How you do make a virus controlling your body in a negative manner, stop?

Do everything possible in opposition.

It’s been my plan all along and it is working. People have watched me and noticed my bad days in a variety of ways. They have seen the chaos and worried about me. They have noticed lots of things and not understood what I was attempting to convey. But I’m winning. I’m a winner, and always have been. I’m kicking this one in the ass, it’s just really slow going.

How?

By doing all the things that have always worked for me, regardless of what my brain tries to tell me, or how I feel at the moment.

I kick out every negative thought that I do notice. I take every opportunity to note and abolish anything that I know for certain isn’t mine. I tell my body things about how amazing it is and how it works so splendidly in certain ways (you may have noticed some of this in my poetry of late). I acknowledge that I am practicing all the good healthy habits as much as anyone in my shoes could. I am doing everything right, and I am certain of it because of my years of experience and previous history. I simply know that I am doing an amazing job kicking an insidious beast of a chronic infection in the ass. I label that beast with many different labels based on the context and factors involved, but in every situation I am acknowledging “this thing is toxic, it is lieing to me/my body, get it out, I deserve better”.

Simple and complex simultaneously.

I’ve even talked with Nathan about this quite a bit. He has been reading “Becoming Supernatural” by Dr. Joe Dispensa. It was recommended by one of my clients on a parallel journey, and it had helped her with some action steps, so he has been putting it to action in meditating on growing a new kidney. But I have encouraged him further. I suggested: What if the kidney failure was virus lies? Take self talk into the realm of opposition. AKA: My kidneys were lied to, they work just fine, and all the elements and descriptors that you do know to be true. Fill in the gaps where medicine can’t. I told him to tell himself he is healing and that his kidneys are improving and what that would look like. We discussed the visible signs to watch for, assuming it will work, including bringing up the memory of being over-dialized.

I told him to treat his brain like a computer fighting a virus. Quarantine every noticable instance. Delete contaminated files, and/or restore to prior version. Overwrite thought patterns that allow the virus to flourish.

There is no human antivirus (stupid vaccine did nothing truly helpful). So, we have to individually create our own mental antivirus software, we have to catch every bit of it ourselves. We have to eliminate every instance ourselves and create better every moment. We have to make it obvious to the virus that it isn’t welcome in our brain or body, and do everything it would rather we not do. Make it want to leave.

If you have to take up writing poetry to help yourself focus on that. Then do it. Make art with that goal. Take supplements that help even if your brain contrives nausea. Exercise even when your brain tries to convince you that you’re too tired. Stretch to fix stiffness. Salt baths to help stiff, sore, or bogged down with other’s energies. Eat stupid healthy, even if your brain tries to convince you otherwise. Eliminate stress every way possible. Turn your back on arguments or negatives you can’t control.

Anything and everything needed to nix negatives and replace with positives.

Like NIKE- Just do it.

And don’t expect a miracle… Hope for it if you want, pray for it too, but more just allow yourself the time and space to enable your body to do what it was designed to do. And it does take time.

We were first round- January 2020, and positive Omicron January 2022, with maybe 2 rounds during Delta timeframe (unconfirmed despite avid testing). I’ve watched clients, friends, family, all deal with the aftermath, some in denial but still very obviously in the midst of it. I’ve wrangled my own long-haulers, while navigating for my immediate family, because they all really on me. I’m still not 100% clear, but I’m far enough that I can see the trajectory enough to believe I’m over the hump. Regardless, I can tell by the way I feel and results I’m getting that I’m on the right track. I will win this, and my writing this post is in hope that it will help others. After this post I’ll likely go back to mostly poems.

FYI. One last note. I’m a bit stunned how much of what Abraham Hicks has been teaching for the prior 15 years applies directly to this sentiment. I’m really just rewording their message, but with emphasis on how it applies to fixing the damage and resetting your body to original standards. It’s almost like they knew this was inbound and we needed the mechanics I just described, to fix it. I know I have it down well enough to maintain stasis. Now I just need to move into solid improvement enough to be visible to others.

May you see the process and how to clear the hump. May you clear all the negatives and heal fully. May you understand the fullness of things in your experience and how they might help yourself and others around you. May you know that you can win against this or anything else. May you see the miracle of your body and know anything that isn’t yours doesn’t belong. May you have a clear and relatively easy path to the solution. May you know you can do it. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Allopathic ignores Mind-Body

This is a slight continuation of my previous post. I forgot one point I wanted to convey.

Allopathic medicine chooses to ignore the Mind-Body connection.

I chose my words here carefully. It is a conscious choice of medicine to ignore the role of the mind in the health of the body.

There is pretense to help with the mind because depression and anxiety have a whole host of medications that are often picked randomly and given a fair chance to help. There is also various methods of mental counseling, some of which can help greatly. I myself have utilized those techniques after medications fell horribly short of any relief (they didn’t do anything because my depression was thyroid linked and medications attempted didn’t even address thyroid for decades).

However, those psychological techniques are merely tools that one can use to right their own thoughts and realign with their higher self. In order for lasting relief to be gained one must practice them until they become second nature. That is the hardest part and the one that American Allopathic medicine currently could not care less if you actually master them.

Here in America you are given 14 weeks to break free from depression’s death grip. If that fails, it is up to you to figure out how to obtain more care, which often means either switching practitioners or taking a break so that your care can be counted as a new 14 weeks. Certain diagnosis’ can get you indefinite care, but often at your own expense regardless of income level, that is unless the condition is so severe it is found as a permanent disability.

Yet, this is after Allopathic medicine has well documented the placebo effect, the effects of meditation on the mind and body, and many instances of spontaneous healing of a wide variety. They have documented it so well that most doctors will say, yes it’s a possibility but because we don’t know how it works we can’t rely on it.

Yet they do know how it works. Hundreds of studies on meditation have documented direct effects on the mind and the body. They range from hormone level changes, to nerve function, to brain function during MRI’s, to effects on blood pressure and heart rate. They have documented thousands of cases of the effects of solid meditation in the mind and body. Enough to even have statistics along the lines of: X meditation practiced Y amount of time leads to Z percent of relief.

So why isn’t meditation and those other psychological techniques a priority? Why don’t we teach everyone how to do them and guide them enough that they do become second nature?

I believe the reason for this and my previous posts’ points is that they want us to stay sick.

They make more money off of us when we are not fully well. The American Allopathic system makes a ton of money off of treating symptoms enough to keep us alive but not fully healed. That is the biggest pandemic of all, and one that many people are still blind to.

Just like my thyroid disease. It was ignored for 20 years while trying depression meds; given basic medication treatment for 6 and was promised a lifetime of continued medication. I, via a helpful client have stumbled onto the true root cause and thus a potential final solution. If the hypothesis works I won’t need medication any more, which means the medical system will quit making money off of me. They can’t stand that idea.

What started as a system over 200 years ago with intent to genuinely help people heal, has become a big money making factory system. We are all just the cogs that keep it running. If you choose to decided that that is unacceptable, like me, you will likely run into the same wall of uncooperative doctors that I did. It simply becomes a threat to their livelihood. You will have to stand your ground and keep your wits about you, because they will do their best to dissuade you or convince you that your desires are either impossible or crazy. They will do anything to challenge your intelligence and make their system of symptom management seem like it is the better and only real choice.

The biggest problem is that they control the necessary tools to document your progress and processes. With the exception of most blood based labwork, you need the damn doc’s to order bigger tests and write temporary scripts to buy the time needed to accomplish the real goal. For some of the alternative treatments you would also have to have a practitioner willing to do them, and some of those treatments require specific certifications or an MD. That has been my battle the last 2 years, that is once I realized if I wanted full health and that I would have to take matters into my own hands and figure it out on my own. Now I battle to find someone willing to help me, and hopefully my client’s Functional Medicine guy will be my answer.

If you are on a journey like me, I wish you the best of luck and recommend the following documentaries.

The Secret” and it’s counterpart “The Opus”

What the bleep do we know

”Heal”

“The Gut, Our Second Brain

There are dozens of others that will come up if you watch those, it will truly become a rabbit hole.

May you be well informed on your health possibilities. May you see new avenues to try. May you find practitioners willing and able to help you with your preferred choices. May you find the answers you seek. May you find your way out of being a medical cog. May you find true health. May you be wholley well and fully healed. May you live the life you desire.

Siva Hir Su

I’m sorry Western Medicine.

Dear Western Medicine, Doctors, Nurses, scientists, and all manner of other technicians,

 

I was already stuck in a mental loop, I refer to as hamster-wheeling, over writing this letter. I sat down to word press and found myself drawn to read 2 blog posts before commencing on this letter. Needless to say they only fanned the flames.

If you care to be informed:

Weeds Reads

and

Patient Caps

Now for what I already had been mulling over:

I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you. Western medicine, I am mad at you, very upset, and I’ve lost faith in you. I’m sorry if this angers and upsets you. Many of those that I have dealt with, that are supporters of you, make this blatantly clear. I am not supposed to express a dislike of your ways. However, I need to point out that this relationship we have; it’s like the relationship between a lying child and a parent. You can only be lied to so many times before you begin to dis-trust everything that is being said. I have definitely hit that point with you western medicine. Furthermore, I’m not alone in this, many are just like me.

Why, you may ask; it’s a long sad journey that brings me to my current reality. No longer trusting any tag line, any generic description or disclaimer, not trusting anything until I’ve read, researched, and talked with others in depth about it.

When I was 12 years old I went from sightly plump at 105 pounds to 168 obese pounds in about 6 months. My weight gain brought a deluge of bullying from kids in school. I became very depressed immediately. I was hearing my parents discuss my weight, my lack of signs of puberty, my father calling me a tattle-tale-little-bitch and then turning around and questioning my mother as to why I wasn’t menstruating. She took me to the doctor, and they tested my thyroid for the first time. Low side of normal, she’s fine, the weight is just probably a side effect of puberty and will eventually back off, she’ll also eventually start cycling- it might take several years for puberty to fully take effect, and the depression is probably just because of the tormenting kids at school. My mom believed it whole-heartedly and took the news to my father, who informed me I needed to suck it up and ignore the other kids and focus and lose the weight.

I spent the next year sleeping my depression off. That year I spent most days going to school, coming home and doing my homework, eating dinner and going straight to bed. More days than not, I slept 12 hours, still feeling exhausted and depressed when I was awake. That was the first year I contemplated suicide, dreaming of putting my head in the oven or taking too many pills. I decided if an option hurt, it was not really an option, because I was more afraid of the pain than death. Death was the solution to ending my current level of pain. By my 13th birthday I was up to 195 pounds.

The pain and depression continued. By the time I graduated high-school I was 265 pounds and at that point we’d moved 3 more times, and I’d been to 3 more doctors in 3 more states. All of them getting the same lab results and telling me the same thing. My menstrual cycle didn’t start until I was almost 17 and even once it did, it was irregular and excruciatingly painful. My mom would only say, “I don’t know what to tell you kiddo, I had the same problems when I was your age, maybe you’ll grow out of it.”

I went through college in like fashion. Same excruciating pain, heavy flow, exhaustion, and depression, often feeling like I was dragging a 1000 pound body around trying to get through my days. I sought the advice of yet more doctors, first private, then through the University of Iowa, then through the Iowa Cares public assistance program. I had my thyroid tested every time I saw a doctor. Hindsight being 20-20: probably because all of my symptoms pointed that direction. By the time I graduated from college I had seen a dozen doctors and was already being told I was borderline diabetic. Yet, no-one could help me fix anything. I finally went to a shrink, tried Zoloft, tried Paxil. All they did was give me dry mouth, I got more benefit out of taking B-complex vitamins and magnesium- that is, when I could afford them. The bathroom scale by that point hovered between 280 and 295. I was walking miles per week, as by that point I lived rural, and a rural square block was just shy of 4 miles. I did that 3 to 4 times a week. It never helped me loose a pound, but did help me maintain some sanity. When it got cold with winter, I fell, that was the year I almost drove myself into the pond down the street.

When I went back to school for massage I lost about 30 pounds and would hover between 250 and 260. I followed all of the advice I was getting in school. My diet started changing, more veggies, less carbs, lean meat only, cooking meals one day a week so that I could serve up measured portions for the fridge and freezer. I was taking supplements, I was meditating, and via school I was getting 3 massages a week, and giving about 20 massages a week- many deep tissue. All of those good habits and I could never drop below 250.  The depression came back with a vengeance.

I’ve struggled through another 8 years since then. More of the same. I tried Gerson Therapy, which by the way is not only massively difficult, but most western doctors call it quack medicine and the FDA and AMA will not let Gerson Institute set-up shop in the United States. Despite this opinion it was the best luck I’d had yet, enabling me to get back down to 240 and maintain, but I could never drop any lower than that, despite walking a mile or more every day while walking our dog.

I was exhausted trying to figure out what was wrong with me. Why couldn’t I loose weight even when I was doing everything that healthy people were supposed to do. Strength was not an issue- I could pick my husband up, and he weighed as much as I did, and do 9 deep-tissue massages a day- though I’d rather not because it took all of my energy to do so.

It was shortly there after we were on an Amtrak train riding to my husband’s sister’s funeral. The funeral was very unexpected because she died after having what seemed like an anxiety attack in which the ER had blown her off as having such, after she died in the waiting area the pathologist never could tell us what actually killed her, but said it was “likely and aneurysm” (though he admitted he couldn’t find evidence of one in autopsy).  Anyway, on the train ride I had a conversation with a woman. The conversation lead to her story that eerily matched mine. She said she finally found a doctor in Colorado that had made some discoveries about thyroid conditions and iodine. She told me what she was taking and how much and what it was helping with. I was so very excited. I had something that I could try, and maybe, just maybe it might help.

After the funeral I went home, found the iodine from kelp and started taking drops in my water. It helped so much I could feel it providing me energy. I would literally get an energy boost 30 min after taking 3 drops. The pounds started melting off.by the end of 90 days I’d lost 45 pounds and got pregnant! Now mind you: I hadn’t been avoiding pregnancy for the previous 8 years. I found it amazing that 3 months of iodine could result in that much weight loss and pregnancy after everything else I’d tried. I simply couldn’t believe it at first.

The pregnancy made me though! When I got pregnant I started having real trouble with blood sugars, but only with certain foods. I was discovering food allergies, but the doctors I saw were not agreeing. They were essentially saying you are just diabetic, take the medicine and insulin and shut up. I kept pointing out with my pages and pages of logs that they refused to read that I could eat sweet potatoes or brown rice and be fine, but other foods were not ok and some things (regular white potatoes) would send my sugars well above 300. I was infuriated. I also pointed out the iodine enabeling pregnancy issue and all they could do was tell me I shouldn’t take iodine because too much would shut the thyroid off. They cited cancer treatments where radioactive iodine is injected near the thyroid to shut the gland down to allow cancer drugs to have more of an effect. I kept pointing out that supplement iodine is ingested not injected, thus taking longer to disperse through your body, and that it is a safer and more stable compound of iodine to begin with. I spoke of information I’d read citing studies where iodine had helped breast cancer and heart disease and intestinal disorders. I kept saying “If it’s so damn bad then why did it help me lose 45 pounds and get pregnant!!!!” They couldn’t respond with anything other than you shouldn’t be taking iodine. I was so infuriated that I told the doctors to eff off. Eventually, I finally found an Endocrinologist that would leave me alone as long as my numbers were good. I used him to be able to get testing supplies covered by medicaid, and that was it. I found a midwife willing to work with me- mainly because of my binder full of logs and blood-work. The midwife helped me finish the pregnancy in tip top shape, helped guide me with iodine intake, and helped monitor my diet and baby’s growth. I gave birth at home in an inflatable birthing tub full of warm water after 12 and a half hours of labor. My baby was beautiful, healthy, full head of hair, and a perfect 7 pounds 14 ounces. I couldn’t have asked for a better non-medical birth it was so perfect and easy! For a first birth I think it went spectacular. Don’t get me wrong there was pain- lots of it, but the water helped, and I had an amazing support team with my midwife at the helm!

100_1277

After birth I breastfed for 3 months while taking my encapsulated placenta (something western medicine frowns upon, but I am adamant that it helped me). About 2 months in I started to run out of placenta, spacing out the remainder, and the depression returned. By 3 months I’d completely run out and my breasts quit producing milk. I did everything I could to try and get milk production up: teas, frequent nursing and pumping (at the peak an hour apart), supplements, massage, nothing was helping. Finally, I had a massive fall off, and after almost driving myself off the bridge over the Missouri River, I went back to a doctor for help. Hoping that they would care enough to do something. They tested my thyroid again. My TSH was 80- astronomically high. Her solution was a basic dose of Levothyroxin- 1x per day. It was not nearly enough, and on top of that it had Red40 which causes my asthma to flare. So essentially I was getting less than 4 hours of thyroid relief, and then having to use my inhaler 3 to 4 times a day. When I brought that issue up, they just wanted to try Synthroid, which again I had no ingredient list, and no consultation on possible allergic reactions, and they were going to just do 1 – 2x’s /day. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

I went on OverTheCounter natural desiccated thyroid or NDT and told the doctor to eff off again. I increased my iodine intake, but the OTC solution was not perfect- I was still having some symptoms, and it was horribly expensive. Finally after much research and debating with friends, I finally decided to give another doctor a try. This time I went with a referral from a friend and paid cash. He allowed me to try NDT based on symptoms, but said he needed to do blood-work to make sure I didn’t go too far. It’s still very expensive at $265 for 90 days, but it has virtually fixed things.  Finally, at this point I’m mostly OK. I still have dips, induced by my allergies- I’m having a hard time with having enough willpower to eliminate all of my food allergies now that I’ve given birth. It seems making decisions for 2 is the deciding factor for me. I’m tired of hurting and having dips though so I’m working very hard to find that willpower again, and at least now I know what to look for to know I’m starting to have a dip, and I can compensate.

Regardless, doctors have not helped figure out the allergies- I did! Doctors did not figure out the hypothyroid, I did. They didn’t even help sufficiently when I had the really bad fall off after birth, I had to increase using OTC on my own! They haven’t helped with my willpower or desire to fix things, that is all me too! They didn’t help with the depression, they slapped 2 drugs on it and when neither worked all they had for a solution was lets try another. They haven’t done anything for me except cost me hundreds and thousands of dollars throughout my life. They didn’t even get me through a pregnancy safely because when they wouldn’t work with me and acknowledge me as an intelligent person, I found a midwife that would!

Western medicine has failed me time and time again over 22 years, yet I’m supposed to trust it.

I am supposed to believe them when they give me a vaccine with a very vague disclaimer that says “in rare cases persons may have reactions to vaccines, and in very rare cases reactions might be fatal”. Who determines what rare is? What reactions happen when not fatal? Why don’t I get to see actual numbers, especially for each type of reaction? Why, because they don’t even keep track. They might tell you that it’s 1% of the population, but that is based upon the study results, not actual real life occurrences. Even if it was an accurate 1% of the population, 1%  of the United States is currently 3,233,954 people, and of the World it is 731,956,752. I’d hate to be one of those people. And even at 1% that’s a crap ton of people that are “OH WELLS”in the grand scheme of vaccines or any drug for that matter. We are not people: we are numbers. And someone else determines what is a safe risk or not, and no one is concerned about creating any kind of guideline for any drug or vaccine that will help determine if you are going to be in the  “OH WELL” list or the “OK” list. And forget about allergies, good luck asking for ingredients. The doctor didn’t consider my allergies when prescribing the Red40 laced Levothyroxin, I didn’t even get the ingredient list on the first fill. I had to ask for the ingredient list on refill, and then  I had a month’s prescription I didn’t want to take because I knew the Red40 was what was causing my asthma to flare.

And speaking of vaccines, I was given the ultimatum when I suspected I might have either a tetanus infection or a severe allergic reaction that I take the vaccine to receive treatment. If I didn’t take the vaccine I wasn’t going to be treated for tetanus. They didn’t give me the ingredient list even though I asked for it. They didn’t give me details or numbers, only that vague risk description I stated above. And after the injection, then they gave me the breathing treatment and antibiotics. In reality, to cure tetanus in modern medicine they could have skipped straight to the breathing treatment and antibiotics and never touched the vaccine. And that is if tetanus is known to be the infection, they never actually tested me to find out if it was tetanus or allergic reaction. Yet, I was given no choice other than take the vaccine or walk out of the hospital and risk not living.

In my experience, any time that someone is willing to cut corners and avoid disclosing information– it is for a reason!  It doesn’t matter if it is a divorce, business deal, trade transaction, product marketing, or medical concern, if information is undisclosed they are hiding something.

In my situation I feel that vaccine caused my already severe allergies to get worse. I have no idea what all was in that vaccine, but I’ve had worse allergies ever since.

I am educated, I know 3 things:

1) Vaccines are intended to force your immune system to work, in effort to prevent illness due to a specified disease.

2) Allergies are your immune system over-reacting to inanimate objects in your blood stream or body, be they food particles, pollen, mold spores, dust particles, or chemicals.

3) Vaccines have many more ingredients than they used to, and many ingredients are completely unrelated to the effect of the vaccine at all.

This is an ingredient list for some tetanus vaccines found on :

Vaccines.procon.org

 26. TD Vaccine
(tetanus & diphtheria)
PROPER NAME
COMMERCIAL NAME
(click for package insert)
MANUFACTURER
PACKAGE INSERT DATE
GROWTH MEDIUMS & PROCESS INGREDIENTS VACCINE INGREDIENTS
(not in order of quantity; see package insert for quantities)
Tetanus and Diphtheria Toxoids Adsorbed For Adult Use
DECAVAC
Sanofi Pasteur, Inc.
Mar. 2011
Mueller and Miller medium, peptone-based medium, extract of bovine muscle tissue,formaldehyde, ammonium sulfate thimerosal, aluminum potassium sulfate adjuvant, residual formaldehyde
Tetanus and Diphtheria Toxoids Adsorbed For Adult Use
TENIVAC
Sanofi Pasteur, Ltd.
Dec. 2010
modified Mueller-Miller casamino acid medium without beef heart infusion, formaldehyde, ammonium sulfate, modified Mueller’s growth medium,aluminum phosphate, 2-phenoxyethanol, sodium chloride aluminum phosphate, residual formaldehyde, 2-phenoxyethanol, sodium chloride, water for injection
Tetanus and Diphtheria Toxoids, Adsorbed
Mass Biologics
Feb. 2011
modified Mueller’s media(contains bovine extracts),formaldehyde, ammonium sulfate,aluminum phosphate aluminum adjuvant, residual formaldehyde, thimerosal
Tetanus Toxoid
Sanofi Pasteur, Inc.
Dec. 2005
peptone-based medium,formaldehyde, ammonium sulfate, physiological saline solution thimerosal, formaldehyde
Tetanus Toxoid Absorbed
Sanofi Pasteur, Inc.
July 2005
peptone-based medium (contains extract of bovine muscle tissue),formaldehyde, ammonium sulfate,aluminum potassium sulfate (alum) thimerosal, physiological saline solution

Why is it that I have to look this information up online after receiving the offensive vaccine, and it is not provided in the office in which the injection is received? I don’t even know if the vaccine I received is one of these or another that is not listed, they gave me that little information on it. I believe that is wrong, especially since I requested an ingredient list while sitting there trying to decide what I was going to do.

Regardless, what all of this boils down to, is less about the physical and more about the interpersonal and legal. If any one of the doctors over the last 22 years had listened to me or my mother and actually put forth effort to help me, I may have never spent 22 years in pain and battling depression. If any one doctor had stepped up and really cared about the depression as a symptom I could have had real lasting treatment. What if I had lost the battle to depression? Would anyone have cared or even known that it was a medically based issue? Or would they be doing what people did with Robin Williams and other suicide victims. It is not selfish when your brain is malfunctioning and misfiring causing the depression and resulting suicidal thoughts. Robin William’s wife has come out and stated he had Lewy-Body, that is the same if not worse than Thyroid related depression. My heart goes out to him and his struggles, especially knowing that Western Medicine doesn’t really care about fixing the problem if they can continue to milk you for your money. Yet, society repeatedly called him selfish. If you only knew what it was like to be in that place you would never utter those words. Depression is not selfish, when you are the one dealing with it, all you want is out and when no-one can help you out, then you are left facing the fact that death might really be the only way out.

That’s interpersonal, that is a real issue that is being ignored. Then legally, doctors are allowed to over-ride decisions made by people if they decide it is their prerogative to do so. Doctors can decided for you if you are treated, how you are treated, what you are treated with, and if you decided you don’t like their choices they can make life hell for you or your family, or you simply have to start over and find a new doctor. I think that is wrong. Be it a cancer patient choosing not to do chemo, a parent choosing not to vaccinate, a depression patient begging for real solutions instead of randomly trying any one of a number of psych drugs that may not solve the problem if depression is merely a symptom (as in my case), or a patient wanting a drug that will solve the problem without creating another through allergic reactions (Levo). Patients, or in children’s cases- parents, should have the final decision, and ALL of the information should be provided to make an informed decision.

I am literally begging for western medicine to hear me, because the real problem is that I want western medicine to find solutions. I want to have a trusting relationship with western medicine. I want to believe that doctors really do care about me as a person and not just the numbers of my labs or the numbers I represent statistically. I know that if I broke a bone or had a heart defect, western medicine could step in quickly and effectively and fix that problem. But that is where my faith in doctors stops. I’ve worked on too many people that have had 3 and 4 back surgeries to still have pain.

I currently work on someone that had a car accident 5 years ago. She’s had 3 back surgeries, had both shoulders worked on and then replaced, both knees worked on and then replaced. Yet she is still in massive amounts of pain and unable to function normally. She’s loosing her teeth, loosing her hair, can’t turn her head more than 30 degrees to either side, yet she still has faith that the doctors will find her some healing. I’m doubtful.

I want western medicine to quit milking the American people and find real solutions. You are telling me that in 100 years we’ve gone from steam engines and no electricity to computers that can speak and listen and are the size of your hand and make phone calls. But in that same time the only things we have definitively done in healthcare is perfect mending bones and removing/transplanting organs. We can’t cure most diseases, because even bacteria are becoming resistant to antibiotics. We have multiple diseases (diabetes, asthma, heart disease, COPD, AIDS, and a variety of Cancers/Leukemias) that are so unsolved that they have moved into the realm of permanent money makes for Western Medicine, that is unless the patient dies from the disease. I’ve known people that went into remission with cancer 3 times before finally ceasing to live through the treatments. I know someone now that has type 1 diabetes from a childhood illness, and she’s had an insulin pump for as long as they have existed, currently spending $1500 a month for her insulin and other diabetic supplies. It is wrong. I want medicine to work, I want doctors to listen to their patients and care, I want medicine to fulfill it’s promises, I want medicine to care about people not numbers and money. Medicine is supposed to “First Do No Harm”, well, I think it’s failing at that.

I am obviously very passionate about this issue, and I’m sorry if you don’t agree with me. However, I find that most people that disagree with me have never had any significant issues to deal with. They haven’t spent 22 years trying to solve an invisible problem. So in a way, I’m happy for them, and I hope they continue to have such wonderful health. I just wish they would understand why I feel they way I do, and quit trying to argue with me that western medicine is great. It’s only great if you don’t really have anything invisible to deal with. If it’s a bone, or an organ that needs repaired- they’ve got you, you’re good to go. Otherwise, it’s a hopeless battle to figure it out on your own and hope you can find one anomaly of a doctor to agree to let you try what you want.

May you all have wonderful health, and never find yourself in a 22 year long hopeless battle!