Tag Archives: joyful

Your best joyful.

Today’s Sadhguru quote:

I was already thinking about my childhood when I saw the quote. Initially, contemplation was stirred by several people having asked me if I liked what I do.

I have answered honestly every time that question has ever been asked, and surprisingly my answer is not much different that the first time I was asked years ago.

In general I love what I do. I help people, I enable people to feel better and I often guide them towards finding healing (or with elderly- release, which is its own kind of healing). There have been points in my history where finances were very tight or other elements were stressful, but mostly my career is low stress and adequate financially. I will likely never become a millionaire on massage alone, but I have changed lives and helped others find less stress and more peace. I help people every day that I get up and go do what I do best.

And that is the key: WHAT I do BEST.

My best is not always hands rubbing and poking muscles. My best is not always words that come out of my mouth. My best changes from moment to moment. Sometimes it is energy work, sometimes it is the massage, sometimes it is saying just the right words at just the right moment, and sometimes it is what I do when I’m not earning my keep.

And I don’t always manage my best, but I always know why.

My mom was key in better understanding of the phrase “Always do your best”. She was the one that repeated it frequently, but she also had a deeper understanding of it.

She would tell us stories of how she was punished by teachers when she couldn’t read the blackboard after having had Scarlett fever, and finally one teacher figured out she simply couldn’t see. She would tell us stories of being moved around over and over again because she was a military kid, and all of the trouble it caused for her, but how she would get through. There were dozens of stories I heard as a kid where she was conveying that she was doing her best to survive and get through even when no one else noticed or cared, but eventually it mattered and got better.

She was key in my understanding that “Always do your best” only really matters to you. It only matters to the person doing their best. You are the only one that can determine if you are doing your best in any given moment or any given situation.

I then thought of when I was a kid participating in district solo and ensemble competitions. I was that kid that aimed for the 1’s not because I got ribbons and medals. No I aimed at the 1’s because I wanted to do my best regardless of anyone else. I would sit in a corner practicing quietly and let everyone ignore me, and later I would beat up on myself for mistakes because I knew I could do better. It wasn’t until years later that I understood I had already done my best because stage fright was real for me. Simply having managed receiving 1’s multiple times over, when battling stage fright intensely, was a feat in and of itself. Simply conquering my dyslexia on my own was a feat of my fortitude.

I was the kid that was bullied, molested, picked on or ignored mostly. But I still did my best getting good grades, setting curves, winning music and art competitions, and volunteering whenever I was able.

And to this day I am satisfied with my self-sufficient kick-ass way of always doing my best.

None of my accomplishments mean anything to the world, but they are no less amazing and spectacular. None of my accomplishments mean much to my birth family, but they are no less amazing and spectacular.

I am standing on my own and with great knowing that I can and will continue to do so, no matter what.

I am in a marriage that was completely unsupported by anyone. I have kids that were unaccepted because they are mixed race. I have largely done it all on my own and I still give my love to others daily.

I do not need anyone to support me or make things better, because I know that I always do my best, no matter what. I also know that those that shy away from me because of my baggage, are entirely missing the point.

I am a beautiful goddess and strong in my power. I am not perfect, I am a human goddess. I make mistakes, and I understand how to do better the next time. I constantly strive to do better because I know my best can keep improving. My best matters to me because it got me through when there was no one and no way to do it otherwise. My best is the result of all I’ve seen, done, and learned along the way.

And I forgive myself for the moments that weren’t my best. Humans make mistakes. It’s what you do with your mistakes that matters.

So yes, I love my career because it bring great satisfaction with minimal stress and it allows me to do my best every day I live.

To quote Abraham: “Money isn’t the root of all evil, but it isn’t the cause or solution of everything either”. For me I’d love to have more money, but I’m satisfied with the results of doing my best, even if more money never comes. My best is what has always mattered to me the most, and it’s not always measurable in dollars.

May you know that you do your best always. May you know what your best looks like and find forgiveness for the moments that aren’t. May you always understand why you didn’t accomplish your best and know how to improve next time. May you see the good in all parts of your life and have greater understanding for yourself and others. May you find that your best guides you to joyful work and a joyful life. Above all may you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

New Year: She-Ra & Snow Dog

Happy New Year’s again everyone. I’m doing my best to bring in the new year in the best way ever.

I started the day with a marathon of self-care and She-Ra.

So this linked site expounds on thoughts I’ve had today: “8 Reasons ’80s She-Ra Was a Feminist Badass and …” …I’m tempted to buy the action figures, though maybe for my birthday, give myself time to catch up from the current round of holidays.

I woke feeling stiff and my kids wanted attention. I had bookmarked the 2018 She-Ra on netflix ages ago but hadn’t been able to watch it. So, I set my shiatsu mat to rolling, turned on my ultrasound/infrared handheld, and hit play on episode one.

I was enthralled and everything was close enough to my memories of the show of my childhood, that everything came flooding back. I told Nathan “Apparently I have She-Ra programming in me too!”

I’m strong, I want to fight for justice, I zap people with my special powers (Reiki), I have to focus really hard to use my powers for good, I’m figuring things out as I go, and want to bring balance and set things right again. Now if I can just get my body to look like that, I’m set. It’s getting there. Hey maybe in another couple of years I’ll accomplish it.

I told Nathan though, my hair doesn’t do what hers does, and wouldn’t unless there was an “UP fan” blowing on me constantly. I explained my hair is so thin and has absolutely no body, so even when I’ve coated it in enough hairspray to be crunchy it still droops and ends up flat. I can’t even hold curls without a perm and for me perms wear off in half the time of other people.

Regardless, I’m definitely seeing some similarities to my life though, at least if you’re talking in broad quality descriptions. It also stirred a desire to not only finish the new reboot, but also to revisit the show of my youth.

Anyway, our marathon was 3 or 4 episodes before my kids got antsy to play in the falling snow. So we stopped the Roku and got bundled up in layers. It’s the first real snowfall Kansas City has had this winter and I wanted to make sure we could enjoy it for a long while.

Outside: I pulled kids around in the sled, I sent the two littles sliding down our little hill, we had snowball fights, I made a Snow-Angel, Anya built a small snowman, and I made a Snow-Dog. It was a ton of fun. (Pics below) the snow dog is not as impressive as the girl with cat and teddy bear I did a decade ago in KC, KS, see those here in my 3D artwork gallery.

Once we came back in, I built a fire in the fireplace, Nathan made hot cocoa, kids were sent to play in their room and I’m taking my Epsom Salt bath. So far it’s a splendid day.

May your new year start equally splendidly. May you have good times and understand where some of your programming came from. May all of your programming be helpful once you understand it more fully. May you help save the world. And finally may you know your are loved, God supports you, and your kids have the best chance of any generation to help make things right in our world.

Om Shanti