Tag Archives: meditation

Suga’ Breathe… That’s for me.

Still working on pulling up. Had some thoughts of the progress sort, and wanted to share them. I’m feeling like poems fit the bill.

The first poem is building on the meditation concept from yesterday, where the in breath was “I am greater than my body” and out breath was “I am greater than my mind”. Each line of the poem is intended as one breath in or out.

The second poem was a result of contemplating my stress induced unhelpful food choices of late, and how to correct.

In between is a very applicable song, and one that helps me a lot.

The title picture for the post is me wearing a 2X shirt. It was a free marketing ‘gift’. I used to completely fill shirts that size once upon a time. Now I feel like I’m wearing a tent. It was a moment of appreciation of my progress and a helpful distraction.

Breathe:Know
(A meditation in poetry)

In: I am
Out: me

I Am
Here
I am
Present
I am
Connected.

I am
Energy
I am
Light
The Fire
That fuels
My
Being,
Inspires
Life.

I am
Matter
I am
Atoms
And
Nuclei,
That which
Grounds
My body
In Now.

I am
Water
Flowing
Through
Veins
Carrying
Oxygen
And nutrients,
Flowing
In and out
Cells' walls.

I am
Air,
Breath
Filling
Lungs,
Inspiration
In action,
Stirring
Processes
To solutions.

I am
Whole
I am
Me
I am
Greater
Than what
Is seen
I am
Divine
In flesh.

I am
Where
Above
Meets
Below,
Sky
Meets
Land,
Spirit
Meets
Flesh,
In between,
The cusp of
The veil,
The brim of
The vortex.

I am
Beautiful
I am
Love,
Venus'
Soul
As
Woman,
Creative
Power
Is mine.

I am
Strong
I am
Capable
I do
More
I reach
For
Greater.

I am
Better
I am
Well,
I heal
Inside
And out,
Top to
Bottom,
Front to
Back,
Left, Right,
And everything
In between.

I am
Me
Growing
Doing
Being
Improving
Healing
Moving
All
I am

~ Treasa Cailleach

See the Suga'

Chocolates, peanut butter cups
Rice, pastas, breads
Peaches, apples, berries galore
All sweetness
Craved
By taste buds.

A symptom of
Imbalance.
Cravings,
A desire to
Restore balance.
Cravings stir
Addictions
When efforts
Become futile
Cycles.

The imbalance
Too much bitter
Outside self.
The body knows
There must be sweetness
Somewhere.
The craving starts.
A void of sweetness
No food can fill.
If one uses food
Addiction is certain
Endless cycles
Of unfulfilled
Cravings

Real solutions
Are to see the
Sweetness
Everywhere
Possible

If bitterness
Fills experience
Then sweetness
Must rise to
Balance
Bitter experience
If sweet fills diet
Then bitter
Must rise to
Balance
Sweet diet

Yin
Balances
Yang
Or eventually
Excess
Manifests
Deficiency
Natural cycles
Will always
Work towards
Correcting
Restoring
Balance

See the Suga'
Taste the bitter
Right wrongs
Fill voids
Properly
Restore
Balance
Of Self

~ Treasa Cailleach

One last tidbit: Be kind to yourself. Knowing concepts, and being able to navigate their use in times of crisis, are two very different and separate things. Often we know what to do, but have difficulty accomplishing those things when life erupts. Forgive yourself for your lapses and allow others to help when you fail. Hopefully we all have someone willing to help when we fail. We all need someone sometimes.

May you see your improvement. May you find your inner self easily. May you have enough energy, time, and resources for anything you need or desire to do. May you feel better easily and maintain it mostly. May you find your balance and honor and respect yourself. May you find all the ways to see the sweetness and give yourself some much needed love. May you know that the divine loves and supports you in all that you do.

Om Shanti

Heal first.

I’m a slow writer because of dyslexia and I only have 30min to convey what I need to say. I apologize for any typos in advance.

Om Mani Padme Hum … The jewel in the lotus. Your heart sparkles with the jewel of healing. Love yourself for surviving it all. Love yourself for knowing you did wrong and wanting to make it right. Love yourself for doing your best even when traumatized and fighting disease. Love yourself because you matter to god. Love yourself because that is the way to heal everything, inside and out, top to bottom, and all around. You are special and even when you’ve done something horrible there is always a way to heal and make amends. That is our purpose here to make amends for worngs from as many places as possible, even and especially when it is our own misdeeds. Make it right and love yourself even more for doing so.

Heal the world.

Heal our bodies.

Those that survived deserve healing.

Everyone alive deserves healing in whatever that means.

Heal my mystery person. I know they didn’t mean to hurt me, and I know the darkness they carry isn’t theirs. They didn’t deserve it to begin with. They deserve to heal.

Heal my brother, I love him. Our childhood was rough and I wouldn’t have made it through without him. I know we have both hurt each other many times over the years and I hope he forgives me because I know I forgive him. He was traumatized more than I, and he managed to survive and have a family. He deserves healing as much as anyone.

Heal my husband. I love him too. He is my light and my love and has always been there for me when I needed loving support. He deserves to be fully healed.

Heal my mom and dad in whatever way that means. They did their best and I forgave them years ago. I love them. They deserve healing.

Heal the system to actually help people the ways that matter. We need answers and fixes for disease damage. We need treatments that first do no harm, and the system needs to put those treatments first and cover them as much as any treatment. There should also be balance and equality in what is offered and covered, if Viagra can be covered for men than abdominal reconstruction should always be covered for women.

We are alive and breathing in this moment. This is our chance to try again. If we all work together and focus on what is needed then we will overcome.

I have had a week of low backs and hips, everyone that has been on my table has struggled with it in some fashion. Feeling safe and secure and like we can move forward is at the heart of that problem. Heal everyone so that they know it is safe to move on in Whatever that means for them. Heal them so that they know they are supported and secure in themselves.

Heal every ion, every atom, every molecule, every cell and organ of every living being in this world. Anything that isn’t truly alive can be transformed into something helpful. Nothing is created or destroyed, but all can be transformed into their best selves and heal.

I call all the archangels, I call of Christ, I call on Shiva, all the divine beings and great masters from all time. Hear my prayers, hear all of our prayers. We deserve healing and we deserve help and now is the time to do so. We are reaching for you help, let it be so.

May we all know that we are loved and supported by the divine. May we all survive this shift. May we all heal and live better lives. May we all know we are loved and forgiven. May we all see the light and allow for miracles in everything.

Om Shanti

Peace to all in the universe.

Mortality

I hide it well but am grieving. I have not lost anyone in a permanent way yet.

Part of my grief is my learning lessons from my trip to Connecticut. Knowing I don’t fit with my family, that I’m too different from them. I am grieving that my hopes were wasted, that even though they are my own genetic and learned behavior stew, I have grown too much to fit with them. I have learned to respect myself enough to just walk away instead of trying to win them over or make them hear me. But it sucks to walk away from family, especially when I really do love them.

It doesn’t help that I know: my father is actively dieing, my mom wants to be and is ignoring things that most would suggest to get checked out, and my brother is loosing his health because what doctors said to do didn’t work since the root cause was never addressed. That is 3 of my family members that may not be alive many more days, months, or years.

So I’m acknowledging that I don’t fit and I’m choosing to respect myself enough to refuse to subject myself to their disapproval anymore, but it is likely something that may soon be irreversible. It’s extra hard to make that choice.

I just know I deserve better and must do my best to keep growing and healing. Anything that hinders that must be released.

That knowing has me thinking about a lot of things in my life. All the people I care about and care for, and how some of it weighs me down and causes physical pain for me because I let them into my Energetic awareness enough. It’s hard to carry all of that all the time, and my most successful meditations recently have been ones where I manage to let go of all of it for a while. It is all dragging me down when I’m fighting tooth and nail to climb up.

It makes me want to run quite frequently, but then I acknowledge that my sensitivities will travel with me. Physical distance does nothing to solve a problem based in Energetic awareness. Yet I am not aware of the solution for my situation, or even anyone that has gone through this particular variation.

How do you fix something there are no answers for?

There is not a solution for Epstein Barr. There is no solution for Covid long-haulers. There is no solution to knowing you are likely to loose a large portion of your family in a relatively short span of time. There is no solution to being the black sheep of the family. There is no solution to fix it all.

Or is there?

Meditation is the closest I have found, and I am no monk. I hope that all my hopes are founded, and that my meditations really are enough to let the solutions and healing in.

So, I distance myself, I let go of others and grieve, and then I meditate.

Sometimes the grief takes longer than others, and it frequently repeats. The only solution for the grief is all the other solutions appearing or simple just giving myself enough time. It is a process all its own.

Bare with me if I don’t make sense. Forgive me for ramblings. Forgive me for stupid posts where I’m just sharing the one bright spot I found. I’m doing all the things to bail my boat and survive.

May you find your way through grief. May you never be tortured by a knowing of impending death. May you know you are loved and accepted just as you are by biological and chosen family. May you manage to always respect yourself first. May you have all the solutions you seek. Above all may you know the divine loves and supports you in all that you do, not just when you’re happy, even when you’re grieving, angry, frustrated or drunk (all of those emotions apply to me just today).

Om Shanti